Why Valentine's Day is More Than a Hallmark Holiday

Here’s a little something I wrote four years ago when I was still single but living with my future husband:

Why Valentine’s Day is More Than a Hallmark Holiday

By Mary Anne Christiano, February 13, 2010

Tomorrow will be the day a lot of people fear, according to my friends and from what I’ve been reading in the media.

Guys fear they will not live up to the expectations of their wives because everything is so expensive.

Single ladies feel left out if they are not paired up like Noah’s Ark.

People are throwing anti-Valentine’s Day parties.

It’s really sad that “Valentine’s Day” has become a dirty word just like “Christmas” has (“Christmas” is replaced with “Holiday” or else you are politically incorrect).

Me, I’ve always enjoyed it, whether I was in love or not.

Perhaps it’s my upbeat nature, but the first Valentine’s Day I remember could have been a real disaster.

I was still in grade school and decided to send a Valentine’s Day card to every kid in the class, both boys and girls. The girls liked the cards, but boys still considered us yucky and all my pretty little cards were made into paper airplanes by the boys. I did not let that discourage me from enjoying Valentine’s Day, as I knew I had candy waiting for me at home from my Grandma.

One of my favorite Valentine’s Days, I was a teenager and I didn’t have a boyfriend. Johnny Thunders was playing at the Peppermint Lounge in NYC. I still remember that ad in the Village Voice, “It wouldn’t be Valentine’s Day without Johnny Thunders.” It wasn’t Christmas without him either, as he was always playing somewhere in 1980. And so I started my tradition of non-traditional Valentine’s Days. While most young girls liked getting gold jewelry and flowers from their boyfriends, I never had a problem getting records. My Valentine’s Days were always ultra cool and to this day, I’ve kept the tradition.

Four years ago, I hooked up with my love Dennis in the month of November and we were in love from the get go. By the time Valentine’s Day came along, there was nothing more he could do to prove how much he loved me because I just knew his true feelings from day one.

So I came up with a clever idea. Let’s not make Valentine’s Day about us, let’s make it about other people.

We spent our first Valentine’s Day together at a Gay Right’s Rally for Gay Marriages.

Here we are, a straight couple, supporting couples that did not have the same rights as we did.

We held hands, tightly, as we listened. I smiled gently, at anyone who looked my way, hoping that my positive energy would make someone’s day and my support would mean something.

The magic of doing something for other people in an unselfish way, to me, is what Valentine’s Day is all about.