When Christians Judge

Published April 6, 2013 by Maryanne

judgedFirst, I want to say what a blessing my life is.

As people who follow my blog know, I have the greatest husband, amazing friends and a wonderful family and now, finally, a great church.

Something has been bothering me for a very long time and makes me sad. A friend who was a fellow Christian shoved me out of her life — just like that — and I know the reason is because we don’t share the same political beliefs.

This isn’t the first time I was judged by a Christian and sometimes it seems like some Christians are the most judgmental people in the world and will often take any opportunity they can to criticize someone — as I’ve noticed when I recently visited the blog of a fellow Christian and felt I received an unwarranted haughty, self-righteous verbal lashing. YEESH!

I’ve always been of a live and let live mentality. I have friends from all different walks of life. Yes, I admit I am drawn mostly to creative types as common ground is important to friendships. But I will turn no one down for anything. I’m the one person who will answer all emails, return phone calls, volunteer services, get people together. Even if someone was once an enemy and has hurt me deeply, I’ll give him/her a million chances. Call me a fool, but this is my personality.

I am a NICE person and I’ve been this way even before becoming a Christian.

I understand that not everyone will get along perfectly. BUT — there is good in everyone. Sometimes it’s apparent, other times you have to look for it. So you don’t agree with someone’s political beliefs — okay, then does that person love animals like you do? Do you like the same music? Do you both enjoy summer? Are you both women and of the same age bracket? Are you both foodies? Animal rights activists? Do you enjoy reading? Sports? Yoga?

There are a MILLION things to talk about to find some common ground with another person. There is no reason to dislike someone just because their political beliefs are different. Or even if their religious beliefs are different. We are here on this earth to love and respect each other!

So I have messy hair and a few tattoos — I’ve been in churches where people actually turned around gave me the once-over and turned their noses up at me.

One time a lady in church approached me and said that God told her I was doing something I wasn’t supposed to do. “And you know what it is!” she scolded. Uh, listen lady — if God wants me to know something, he’s going to tell me directly … he’s not going to go through you to get to me! That was over 20 years ago and I told the pastor of that church. He reprimanded her for judging me. And I was grateful for that, as this woman embarrassed me in front of the entire first row of the congregation. I cried so hard that night.

I recently put a Jesus button on one of my bags, but I wish I could add another button that reads, “I’m not one of those Christians who judges people.” Seriously.

One of the nicest compliments I ever received from a friend, was from the friend who said, “Mare, you are the one person who gives the most compliments and never judges anyone.”

That said, I always want to keep the momentum that was always in my heart — the fact that I’ve always been someone who saw the good in people. Even before I knew Jesus Christ.

And that said, I hope, from the bottom of my heart, that now that I’m a Christian, all my friends and acquaintances and clients and family, etc. will still feel comfortable around me. Just, please, be yourselves because I am not a Christian who judges.

I love everyone for who they are!

And I love me for who I am.

I’m blessed that I’ve become the person I always wanted to be,

someone as nice as my Grandmother once was!




14 comments on “When Christians Judge

  • XoX !! YoU illuminAte and inspire… And always hAve a thought provoking slAnt!

    Sent from my iPhone !!!~(*v*)~>^:^<!!! ƸӜƷ*~* ☾~✼* ✼~☀✼♩ ♫_❤*★

    • Thanks for having my back Ivonne — you rock too!! Did you ever see the original movie “Carrie” in the 1970s? Whenever Christians judge they remind me of the mother in “Carrie.” It’s very, very, very scary! 🙂

  • Maryanne, Those last five lines of your post say it all. God warns in the Bible not to judge others, so I try to live by that precept. I have made too many mistakes in my own life to judge others, which would make me a hypocrite. I just try my best to do what is right and to enjoy the time I have left.

    • Oh wow, that’s horrible!! I’m so sorry to hear that. It makes me love my church even MORE when I hear all these other horror stories. I feel the least judged in my church.

      I think if someone is reaching out to another, confessing their sins more or less, the other person should be caring and encouraging, not taking it as an opportunity to preach and be all high and mighty and condescending. It’s so creepy when people do that. Makes me cringe!

  • Brilliant post Maryanne! “I love everyone for who they are! And I love me for who I am.” It actually doesn’t get much more Christian than what you wrote right there, and yet it seems like this message is lost on a lot of so called “Christians”. If you’re going to call yourself a Christian I would imagine some effort should be made to live like Christ according to Matthew, and if you want to go a little Gnostic, then according to Thomas.

    I’m a big Christ fan (those gospels in particular). Even though I don’t refer to myself as a Christian I know the guy had some really great practical philosophies.

    For someone to qualify as a Christian they’d at least want to get the basics right like, loving thy neighbor as thyself, let he who is without sin cast the first stone, judge not lest ye be judged and so on. (paraphrasing)

    Anyway, thanks for sharing, great post Maryanne 🙂

    All the best!


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