Mayra Dias Gomes (writer) & Coyote Shivers (musician)
Last week I was reading my old diaries and recalled my DJ sets at Pyramid Club. I always began the nights spinning the coolest song ever, “Plus One” by Coyote Shivers. Since I have two of his CDs already, I was searching online for more Coyote Shivers music and came across his Twitter and Instagram social media pages and saw that he married a beautiful girl — a writer named Mayra Dias Gomes.
It’s fantastic to read about love and happy endings especially when I have a little something in common … like Mayra, I’m also a writer who married a musician. And like Coyote and Mayra, my husband and I are very much in love, even after seven years (and hopefully none of you are sick of hearing about it, ha-ha). In fact the loving chemistry expressed between those two on Instagram reminds me a lot of my own happy marriage which is why I enjoy tuning in to their world. Happy people just LOVE to see other other people in love. It’s no wonder that once a couple is happily hooked up, right away we start to think about which one of our single friends can we fix up with another single friend. When it comes to love, we want more, we want more! Love is on the brain 24/7.
Then I got to thinking, what is it about a musician/writer marriage combo that makes the relationship work so gorgeously?
First of all, both careers are very free-spirited and creative, so there is never a dull moment. My husband’s brilliance never ceases to amaze me with the creative ways he surprises me and his out of the box thinking.
Both careers do not have a set pattern, neither are a typical 9 to 5 (although I aim for that so we can have our nights free together, except when he’s in the studio or having a band meeting), so there can be times where a musician/writer couple can be like two ships passing in the night, therefore time is always so very precious. Like the other night when I came home very late and then had to make a deadline. Dennis sat at my side to keep me company as I typed away.
Both careers have you in contact with zillions of different people. So both writers and musicians understand the important of trust in a relationship, which to me is a very important element. Nothing is more rewarding than knowing that your man trusts you with all his heart and soul. The word TRUST sends chills up my spine and puts tears in my eyes. I know I am my husband’s angel and he counts on the fact that I would never, ever hurt him, nor would he hurt me. There is a lifetime comfort in knowing that.
The marriage between a musician and writer can mean great opportunities for collaboration. I have no musical talent, but it was a thrill writing lyrics for a children’s Christmas song. Not only did Dennis put music to my lyrics, we had it recorded on a Christmas CD and then were interviewed on a college radio station that played the song. This was just one example of quite a few cool things we’ve done in the studio together over the years. Just one of many dreams come true since I met Dennis.
Both careers have great perks. Between my husband’s connections and my connections, we’re always going to some event or other — free! Since we’re not rich and famous, it definitely helps financially that entertainment doesn’t cost us a dime. Our careers definitely fill up our social calendar. And while my hunny adores me even if I’m just sitting home watching TV in pajamas with my hair up in a bun and no make-up, it’s so great to hear him say how pretty I look when I’m dressed for a night on the town and how lucky he says he is. (But, really, I’m the lucky one!)
I also think that a musician who is attracted to a writer (and vice versa) is a person who embraces change, someone who doesn’t stay stagnant in life. There are always new things to learn and it keeps you young and vibrant. And both careers are ones you can grow old with. I can’t imagine a life without writing. If I was to retire, I’d rather be dead. And if there ever was a day my husband wasn’t picking up one of his 20 guitars, I’d know something was seriously wrong with him. I would definitely check his pulse to see if he was still alive. One thing for sure is, we’ll never be the couple that just wants to stay in the house and rot. We’re always up for an adventure, for meeting new people, for a road trip, for growing and growing old together. We will eventually be that old couple walking on the beach still holding hands.
And before I end this post, I want to add a little side note in regard to the music of Coyote Shivers (cool punk with incredibly funny and clever lyrics). One night when Dennis and I first started dating, I threw on the CD “Coyote Shivers Gives It To Ya Twice.” We were in my old apartment, drinking a bottle of unfiltered pearl sake, making out and laughing like hell because Coyote’s lyrics were so hilarious. Coyote’s funny songs were the back drop to us falling in love — because laughter/humor is KEY to a great relationship. Seven years later, we’re still laughing — at anything and everything. (Even the dumbest stuff like me making up silly songs about women with chipped toe nail polish, sung with a hillbilly accent).
I’ve yet to read Mayra’s books/articles, but I saw some of her interviews on You Tube and I favor the interview with Michael Monroe since I’m a big Hanoi Rocks fan. Mayra seems so down to earth, fun and a true music fan. (Plus she’s also a gorgeous print model!)
I tried Googling “writers who married musicians” and “musicians who married writers” and couldn’t come up anything more to add to all this. So, tell me, are there more happily married writers and musicians out there? Or are there other careers that seem to be a perfect match for couples? I know the musician/photographer coupling works beautifully too, as Paul and Linda McCartney were my favorite rock ‘n’ roll couple ever — just like our friends Tommy (musician) & Darlene (photographer) who have been together over 20 years and are absolutely adorable together.
Happy couples, please come forward, and tell what your careers are.
If we get enough people to participate in this research, we can ditch the whole zodiac compatibility thing and start a new trend about perfect career compatibility love matches. Linda Goodman, look out!
Eternal love and happiness!
Maryanne (writer) and Dennis (musician) – 2010
Sent from my iPhone !!!~(*v*)~>^:^<!!! ƸӜƷ*~* ☾~✼* ✼~☀✼♩ ♫_❤*★
I love hearing and reading about your happy marriage and how much you guys love each other. It gives me hope that someday I will have a partner and a marriage like yours. I get so tired of people telling me that I should want to be alone and be an independent woman- well I have been doing that for the past 12 years and yes I want to be in a happy marriage with a partner that is in love with me and me with them. You are a great role model marriage.
Aw, thanks so much Ivonne! My mom once said the same thing to me too after I ended a relationship with the last jerk. She was like, “You’re like me, you should just be alone.” But I told her, “No, there’s someone special out there just for me!” And sure enough, two months later, it happened. It will DEFINITELY be there if you want it. I know a lot of people that aren’t interested (mostly guys and maybe one girl), that don’t make the effort. But if you get out, do things (things you LIKE), there’s always someone for everyone. I TOTALLY believe it!
Great post Maryanne 🙂 There’s no doubt that career compatibility is key,and just as important is something you hit on in this post. He feels lucky to have you, and you feel lucky to have him! This is one of the keys.
Writers and musicians tend to be free thinkers, bohemian and up for fun. Definitely a good match 🙂
Thanks for sharing!
You definitely have something here with the creativity and uniqueness of your careers keeping you young – it’s a different world out there among the folks who worked static career jobs and only look forward to retirement – in the creative world, there’s no retirement, just more inspiration, fun and curiosity for life. And what a blessing that you have a heart-partner who feels the same.
E.L.Adams (writer) & Dustin Back (musician) ❤ Together since 2012 ❤ e.l.a.e.l.a. on instagram ✔
Cybess , Barnes&Nobel
This is wonderful article! So happy to virtually meet you ! Thank you for writing about our shared type of relationships. It’s enlightening to know we are all in good company.
Very cool Erin! Great to meet you too. Yes, we’re definitely in great company, all of us creative types who find each other.