Such a Small Target … Sigh!

Published July 2, 2013 by Maryanne

SAM_1430Me, two days ago

See the above picture? That’s me, two days ago.

As you can see, I’m not a wrestler or a football player or a BBW (big beautiful woman) model.

I’m just Maryanne. I’m only 5’3″ and about a size 6. (I KNOW 6 isn’t a size 0, but 6 is still fairly petite).

And for the life of me, I can’t imagine why I can’t go to a supermarket without getting at least five shopping carts shoved into my ass.

Yes, this is true. I’m not trying to be funny. I’m pissed, actually.

Here’s my morning.

I go to Shop Rite for kitty litter because it’s the only brand they’ll use.

BOOM! Slammed by a woman twice my size and weight — while I’m still in the parking lot.

“Thank you,” I said, sarcastically.

“I SAID EXCUSE ME.”

Just because you say, “excuse me” doesn’t make it right. Especially since this happened four more times during my visit which was less than an hour.

Second and third time got hit again and again in the grocery section.

Fourth time a woman hit me and said, “Excuse me.”

I said, “People are rude.”

She said, “I said excuse me.”

I said, “Yeah, but you’re the fourth person who banged into me today. People don’t watch themselves.”

The last straw was when I didn’t move fast enough for an overly anxious old lady at the check-out. Once again a cart was rammed into my ass. Followed by, “Excuse me.”

I lost it.

“YOU CAN WAIT ONE SECOND!” I yelled at her.

“DON’T YELL!” the old biddy yelled back.

Of course I’m going to yell. Wouldn’t you, if you got stumped on FIVE TIMES in a single trip?

I left in a huff and couldn’t wait to eat my Rice Dream ice cream pop. I unwrapped it in the parking lot and for the first time since I was a little kid, tossed the stick on the ground. And also left the shopping cart in an undesirable spot so it would inconvenience someone — anyone. I know two wrongs don’t make a right, but I am so sick of people and their selfish ways.

I know I’m small, but I’m not microscopic. I’m also not a slow poke. I move at a reasonable rate. Faster than the people who bang their carts into me, push me out of their way and then move like turtles. Makes no sense.

Had I been a man, or a larger woman, this would not happen. My husband doesn’t get it either. In fact he was the first one who said, “You’re such a small target.”

One time, years ago, I was in Whole Foods and a midget who worked there was running around the store, carrying a large box. She ran right into my stomach and I almost fell over in pain. I was asked by a manager if I needed to go to the hospital. I said “no” but I remember that hard hit like it was yesterday.

People — don’t be so oblivious to your surroundings! Honestly, I don’t know how some people function in the real world.

If you jam your cart into someone’s ass, have a little more cuth than just saying, “Excuse me.” It would be nicer to hear, “Oh, my God, I am so sorry, I wasn’t being careful. Are you okay?”

Because “excuse me” just doesn’t cut it.

“Excuse me” is not a get out of jail free card. “Excuse me” means that I’m going to think of you as an impatient asshole. “Excuse me” says you have no life because you have to rush to wherever you’re going too — no one wants to wait for you because you’re not worth it. “Excuse me” means you do not know how to stop and smell the roses.

So, get it people?! “Excuse me” is lame!

Own up to the fact that you were a jerk and give a semi-decent apology. Make the world a better place to live instead of a worse one. This is really getting exhausting, people! Can you please go back to school and learn some CLASS and manners?!

33 comments on “Such a Small Target … Sigh!

  • On rare occasion when this happens to me I grab their cart & gently shove back, look them in the eyes & say “DON’T hit me with your cart!” If they say ‘excuse me’. I say “DON’T hit me with your cart! Have a little patience & look where you’re going!!” > I’ve never been bumped twice, and good thing because they’d be picking their groceries up off the floor after that. I don’t have your patience when it comes to pricks invading my personal space.
    You showed great restraint, I’d be yelling at asshole #2 lol

    • LOL!! Good for you, Ed! When I was younger I’d be more sarcastic and say, “Oh thank you, I just love getting a cart shoved up my ass!” but that drew too much attention, which I don’t welcome in my middle age šŸ™‚

  • hA!! it HaPPens To me tOoooo. ( nO CaR tho!!)).. i tHink i taKe uP Too mucH SpAcE… i ThInK “GaNgWaaaaaAAAY!!”ā˜…ā™«ā‰ā£ā¤ā™¬ā˜†ā™”!!

    • Ha-ha! “Gangway” — that’s so funny! And it gets you more off-guard in NYC because you guys all have a great system — walking a decent speed on the right and left sides. One time someone in NYC bumped into me and I was shocked. So I yelled at them, “Get out of my way, here I come!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

  • On many, many occasions, my mommy has wanted to turn to one of these rude humans and say, “It’s all about you, isn’t it?!” She hasn’t done it, yet, but now that she’s 50, well, watch out rude people!

  • Haha! Way to go little you. I’m the same size and I hate how people bump into me, I say sorry! And they look at me as if to say, “So you should be” Lol
    It drives me batty!! Lol Way to go eating the ice-cream. Size 6? Don’t get the American sizes.
    You look tiny to me! Hugs Paula xxxx

  • Maryanne, I totally get this! i thought it was just me. I sometimes feel like I am invisible. I am so sick and tired of getting bummed, cut off, and ignored. This happens almost on a daily basis. I was actually developing a complex over it, but now I realize everyone is so caught up with themselves they just don’t pay attention to their surroundings. Everyone seems to have this “get outta my way’ attitude. THEY are more important, THEy need what they need RIGHT now and everyone else needs to look where THEY are going. I have now become overly cautious in places like parking lots because I have almost been hit several times while backing out of parking places by people driving WAYYYYYY too fast, not looking and expecting that everyone else needs to look out for THEM. I am so totally sick of it!

    • It’s insane, right? I think “excuse me” means “get out of my way.” Today I was even at the zoo trying to look at something in the gift shop to surprise Dennis with. Some lady, with her kid, goes, “Excuse me” just to get me out of HER way. I had a right to look too and I should have said something. And agreed with the parking lots too! People are ruthless. I thought it was just NJ, but seems this is universal. Sorry you’re dealing with it too.

      Well, I came up with a new bumper sticker idea: “If you have to rush, you’re a loser ’cause you’re not important enough to wait for.” Maybe that will make these self-absorbed assholes THINK!

  • Oh good bumber sticker. Yeah, I am starting to think “excuse me” tranlates to ‘get outta MY way’ as well. I guess it must be a sign of the times; Everyone is too busy, too preoccupied with too many things. Maybe it is just the way some people cope with the expanding population – too many people, we just don’t have time to wait anymore or be polite to every single person. I don’t know.

    • It’s the computer age. We get everything fast so no one has patience to wait. And I admit, I’m fast too — but when it comes to work and getting a job done, not at the expense of other people. I’ll even choose the longest line in a grocery store if it means I’ll get a happy cashier šŸ™‚

  • Hey Maryanne. For some reason I can’t open your recent post. I read it and wanted to comment, but it came up Error and the page won’t open? I love the name of your business and that you are doing what you love. I also love how you don’t allow anyone to control your life, this is very inspiring! Hugs and sorry it wouldn’t open for me. Hugs Paula xxx

    • Thanks Paula. I deleted that one because I realized whenever I write about my business I get all these “likes” from strangers that their blogs are all about “blogging for money.” So I want to keep those people away from me. I’ll have to think of sneakier ways to write about my business, but thanks for your interest šŸ™‚

  • What’s the deal? I can’t believe that many people ran into you. Did you have a ‘Hit Me’ sign taped to your back and didn’t know it? And yea, it would be nice if people were more apologetic. Celeste šŸ™‚

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