When it comes to health goals, the phrase “everything in moderation” has got to go. Would you tell an alcoholic to drink in moderation? Would you tell a diabetic to consumer sugar in moderation? To get from point A to point B you have to be extreme and say “no” — and sometimes for a very long time. Maybe forever. If I did things in moderation, I wouldn’t achieve such great health goals — I’ve freaked out more than one doctor in my lifetime with my health success by being an extremist.. So, don’t talk to me about “moderation.” You ain’t gonna win.
Now, this post isn’t about healthy people going on vacation and bringing food into their hotel rooms because they’re afraid to eat at a restaurant. This post is about people who have a health goal — whether it’s reversing diabetes or losing weight. If you’re serious about something, you gotta stick to it until you get to where you want to be.
As followers know, I’ve been doing the paleo diet for over a year now. For the first few months I was pretty rigid in it. During those first months, I developed fab abs (in my 50s!) and was able to raise my blood pressure to “normal.” That thrilled me because all my life my blood pressure was “too low.” Doctors said “too low” was better than “high” — but for me, I like to be perfect. I also impressed the ladies in the front office at my dentist. They thought I had my teeth whitened! No, my teeth got whiter from eating paleo!
But like anything else, when you’re feeling good and happy, you start to slack off. I’ll never forget, it was around Halloween when I had my first fun-sized bag of chips after four months of avoiding them. They just didn’t taste the same, but I ate them anyway. Then came Christmas and like everyone else, I indulged. Of course the little belly came back, but the blood pressure stayed normal because I was able to get right back into eating paleo. The paleo lifestyle is a win/win because it’s one of the few lifestyles that is so easy because you’re never hungry. The reason you’re never hungry is because you’re feeding your body with beautiful nutrients from good fats (grass-fed butter, avocado and coconut oil). So, now at this point I was eating about 80 percent paleo but also some grains.
Now, if I didn’t know a thing or two about health/nutrition, I wouldn’t have had my own health column in The Patch online. Nor would I have had the opportunity to present lectures on the paleo diet at local libraries. (You can see this awesome article about me that ran in the Observer: http://www.newjerseyhills.com/observer-tribune/news/caveman-diet-discussed-in-long-valley/article_225401a6-6fcd-5968-8968-355e730c439a.html?mode=story
This week, I got into a sweet groove again after buying a package of paleo coconut wraps. I started making avocado/tomato sandwiches with them and also putting some extra grass-fed butter into my bulletproof coffee. Still not 100 percent paleo, but because of the extra fat — I noticed I lost about three pounds in a matter of a few days! The belly was going down again!!
My mistake was sharing this on Facebook.
Leave it to a “joy stealer” to come along and shoot me down. (NOTE: I coined the phrase “joy stealer” to define this sort of asshole: When someone is speaking positively of something they love, whether it be food, their husband, their career, etc. and another person shoots it down, it’s called “stealing joy.” And that is not a live-and-let-live mindset. If you do this, shame on you!)
A woman who drinks three yeasty beers with her lunch had the nerve to tell me “Everything in moderation. Fat is unhealthy.”
It cracks me up. People can drink like fish. Smoke a pack of cigarettes a day. Go to McDonald’s on a regular basis. Put chemicals on their hair. Avoid exercise. No one bats an eye. Then because I had an avocado in a coconut wrap — I have to hear, OH MY GOD I gotta watch my fat intake or I’m gonna die!!!
It’s pretty silly, right? I first said that back in 2004, defending my raw food diet (which is pretty close to paleo, actually … ever since I became paleo, my raw food intake increased dramatically). On day after a minor surgery, before I was self-employed and was still working in an office, I was eating a pineapple for lunch because pineapple is great for healing.
A snooty woman turned her nose up at me, scrunched her face, did the Elvis lip thing, and whined, “You’re gonna eat ALL THAT?”
But she never ever questioned the man who had three slices of pizza for lunch ever day. And she never questioned the ladies who had buckets and buckets of Chinese and Mexican take-out — not once ever making a fresh salad.
No, no, no … it’s the HEALTHY PERSON that people are skeptical of!
Thinking about all this, I came to the conclusion that people who say, “Everything in moderation” are those who feel guilty about their own shortcomings like the yeasty beer chick.
So, before you act like a JOY STEALER when you see someone eating 100 percent raw, or paleo or vegan … or doing the Master Cleanse … Don’t be an asshole and shoot down their goals with the ultra ridiculous “moderation” comment. Let people be and come to their lovely place on their own time. “Moderation” will always be around. Your health, maybe not.
Thanks to grass-fed butter, coconut oil and avocados — consumed daily!
Maryanne Christiano Mistretta is an author and public speaker. She is available to present the lectures “Paleo for Beginners” and “Eat Well During the Holidays.” Will travel. Email Maryanne for pricing and availability: email@example.com
Maryanne is also the author of “Love Cats” — a romantic/erotic fiction story that takes place in the 1980s and is definitely not for the moderation-minded! “Love Cats” is available on Amazon in Kindle and paperback formats: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00YBGVJQS/
I actually have become very reluctant in posting anything on facebook anymore unless is has to do with family. These “Joy Stealers” are like vampires waiting eagerly for the right post to go up on social media to suck the life out of you. One of the books I read years ago that helped me learn all about these, “Energy Vampires”, was a book titled, “The Celestine Prophecy”. It really turned my world upside down.
I just unfriended her and crossed her phone number out of my phone book too.
If people can’t be happy for me, they are not friends.
I’m a total sweetheart. Not to toot my own horn, but I’m not a fan of false modesty either, and I’ve worked hard to become a great person. I support everyone. I’m the person who makes the phone calls, keeps in touch, the first to congratulate or compliment a person on their good looks and successes. If someone can’t be happy for me as I am for them, they are useless to me. I’m 51-years-old and I don’t need that jealousy in my life. And I’m proud enough to say it’s THEIR LOSS — not mine! There’s enough good people in this world that I don’t need to be friends with assholes.
You shut the door on a jerk and an angel flies in your open window. That’s the way I see it 🙂
Awesome attitude Maryanne.
Thanks! Another cool quote, I didn’t make this one up but I LOVE it: “Go where the love is.” 🙂
Facebook is full of joy stealers. If I posted about it being a great day, then some commenter would say “What is so great about it?”
Don’t let the joy stealers rob you of your joy of eating right. Sounds like a great diet.
Thanks so much Andrew! Eating paleo is awesome (and very tasty to take the time to have real food instead of something out of a box!)
Hi Maryanne, I have missed your posts. I thought maybe that a you were on vaca.
Well, you certainly made up for it with one. I found your last two paragraphs extremely uplifting, since I have had quite a week. I will not use the phrase bad week because I am not ill. That is when things are really BAD !!!! Having recently lost a son (stepson,but we never used that word step) that is when things are bad, otherwise you lift yourself up, cope and go.
Your last two paragraphs indicate to me that you like me are the GLUE. The glue of the friendships. The loyalty. Then, when we find these people not feeding back to us it really digs in. I just feel real used though when I take it and take it. In the business world and at home I have always been known for having a high level of patience. I think this is why I have allowed many people the invitation to be two faced to me.
I have now also analyzed that it is the people who go around as if they have halo’s on who are my backstabbers.So self righteous they TRY to appear. So folks, watch out that if you ever meet someone like this. Do not give them the the gift of your friendship & your faithfulness to them.
Hope this can be shared from coast to coast with hundreds of people. This post would be like a gift to all who read it and save them from wasting many hours on these “so called faithfuls”.Give that time to those deserving of it. I am older & always learning or teaching myself something new and it is an excellent way of life. This is how I have always lived this way of life and I love it, but to have to get backstabbed at my age , that is a crying shame. Shame shame on you,you Backstabbers !!
Ok, now it’s time for that angel to fly in. The window is open and I am ready !!!!
Today will be a fun filled day for my family!! It is the feast & celebration of St Mary.
So all my food is just about done including my surprise for all our company which everyone here loves !!! Coney Island Weiners is how you know them as but here in Rhode Island we refer to them as Hot Weinies. Of course there is all the usual Italian dishes too and to conclude I found a new recipe,Italian Fake Bake Cake… Yum yum…. Weather here today is beautiful.. 88 and sunny. Having you and your husband in attendance would make it an even more perfect day !!! You will have to try some year to attend.
Aw, Sandra, bless your heart and soul, you are one of the good ones! Enjoy your special day, it really does sound perfect. (Our day in New Jersey is a little too hot, 101 degrees, so we’re inside chillin’ with the A/C!) ❤