I’m the person dogs run up to in the streets, begging for a kiss. I get down on my knees and they slobber all over me. Owners apologize, but I LOVE doggy kisses!
About a month ago I scored a new client for a project that couldn’t be done remotely.
I was ecstatic to see the client had a little doggie. Immediately I was rubbing the dog’s belly during a free in-house consult which I offer all potential clients..
During the consult, the client wanted to see pictures of my kitties. When I handed the phone to her, the dog flipped out and began barking. It scared the shit out of me. Obviously passing a phone over a dog’s head was not a good idea. Nevertheless, I took on the project, assuming this was a one-time incident.
I was wrong.
Shortly afterwards, there was another incident. I was working for awhile and then got up to use the bathroom. The dog ran up to me, growled and jumped up to my stomach and grabbed my shirt with his teeth. I was terrified. I never had an experience like this in my life.
As a professional, I tried to work through my fears and continued to see the client. Whenever I was there, the dog barked and whimpered while contained in a large cage. The client caved and took the dog out on a leash. Often when the dog saw me, he barked and growled. It freaked me out. I’ve had other clients with dogs and cats. Never a problem.
When a neighbor came to visit, she shared that the dog nipped her!
A few more incidents happened, but I will not get into it. You get the picture.
I started to get a guilt complex and thought I was doing something wrong. I began having nightmares. Do I have a fear of dogs? Should I see a therapist for this “problem”? After much research, and chatting with friends who owned dogs, the answer was no. The problem wasn’t me, but the client.
Here is why:
Dogs need to be trained and socialized, early on, not spoiled.
The dog owner is the master. When dogs bark at guests, there should be a signal, telling the dog to stop. A dog should not jump on guests. (Note, if a dog is friendly, I LOVE when he/she jumps on me. It’s adorable! But when they are growling and showing teeth, that is not a good sign).
If a guest is afraid of your dog, it’s not on them, it’s on you. Keep the dog contained in an area so your guest can feel safe. Holding a dog on a leash, isn’t good enough.
Two days after getting down on myself for this experience, I came to my senses. I am NOT afraid of dogs, only dogs that are territorial and not trained properly. Soon afterwards, I pet two dogs in the street that I never saw before. I got sweet kisses from them. I felt safe. And happy.
Yes, I love dogs. I am not afraid of dogs. That is my truth. I won’t let one bad experience define me as an animal lover. There are no bad dogs; only uneducated dog owners.
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/
Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.
Sunday night my husband found a wounded rabbit near the bushes, near our home. The little guy was alive, but his pelt was stripped off his back and there was also a wound near his neck/shoulder area. Seems another animal tried to attack him and as he was getting away, his pelt stripped off.
Immediately my husband put him in a box and we called dozens of animal refuges, many which were filled to the max; or wouldn’t take rabbits only deer, or whatever animal they specialized in.
The next morning we found Woodlands Wildlife Refuge (www.woodlandswildlife.org). It was an hour drive and the bunny was placed on the floor of the backseat of the car, still alive, but in shock. Every so often his eyes would blink or his little front paws would twitch. Boy, was he a cutie pie. We had high hopes for his recovery.
They took him right in. He was so badly injured, they got right on it.
Sadly, he didn’t make it. In less than 24 hours he was gone.
It’s terrible to see a defenseless animal hurt, and then die.
What does make me feel somewhat okay about all of this is: 1. It was an act of nature and he didn’t get killed by a car.; 2. We tried our best. And at least we had a place to bring him and he didn’t have to die in the bushes and be eaten by bugs.
In honor of this beautiful Eastern Cottontail, my husband bought me a necklace from the refuge, along with a bunny statue (and another statue that looked like one of our cats).
I’ll never forget this sad week, but I did learn a lot about rabbits, and that such a beautiful place like Woodlands Wildlife Refuge exists.
Rest in peace, sweet little bunny. We tried……………
NOTE: The above photo was swiped from Google. Friends have asked to see a photo of the rabbit, but he was too badly torn up. No one would like to see an animal like that, though his beautiful eyes were just fine — big and round. And his front paws were adorable, along with his little cottontail.
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/
Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.
I came across this photo of myself on Facebook from a year ago. The caption was “Step into Monday like a champion.” I liked the concept of me taking a step in the photo, with the caption of stepping into something positive.
To caption the same photo today, it would say “Step into Something New.”
Doing something new isn’t always instant. It takes months, or even years, of thought. Seeds are planted. Ideas comes up. And then you do something about it.
May 2021, we were still in the pandemic. This was around the time I decided I wanted to switch careers. Mind you, writing will always be in my heart, and in some way or another I will always be a writer. Hell, I’m still getting royalty checks from my books. But after you see your books in Barnes & Noble stores, you’ve reached a pinnacle. Where do I go from here? I can keep doing the same thing, continue writing books and articles. Or I can try something different that is also dear to my heart. Why not? You’re never too old to learn.
Last spring, I dabbled in art as a hobby. And then became a certified feline behaviorist.
Yes, cats are my favorite animals. But I love all animals, especially the furry little critters like hamsters, chinchillas, mice, rats, and guinea pigs. I’m also fascinated with fish. And birds.
I see these gentle creatures and it calms me. I want to learn more about them. How to befriend them. How to make them not be frightened. I want to also learn from them. What is it like to be so small in a world so big?!
I’ve investigated what careers there are that involve working with animals. I found something and am now on my way to a certification as small animal specialist!
Will this new career work out as successfully as my writing career? Time will tell.
But I am ecstatic to begin something new, with pets showing me the way! I look forward to working with my new teachers!
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/
Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.
This crazy cat lady is bombarding you all with lots of Puppy love on this special day!
Happy National Puppy Day to all!
And, finally, for National Puppy Day Here’s a cute little poem I wrote several years ago in honor of my Mom’s Chihuahua, Fawn (RIP). Although the poem was for Fawn, I think it relates to many small dogs who think they are bigger than they really are, which is always so endearing. ENJOY!
Combat Chihuahuas Unite!
She’s such a little lady
She’s the perfect companion
But better watch your step because
She thinks she’s a Doberman!
Combat Chihuahuas Unite!
Her bark protects her master
She’s a killer dog from Hell
Fighting crime, she has no time
But she’ll break for Taco Bell!
Combat Chihuahuas Unite!
So pretty in her doggy cape
She may be the cat’s meow, but
“Get this damn thing off me!
I wanna get naked now!”
Combat Chihuahuas Unite!
And when the day is over
When it’s time to go to bed
She’s no longer known as “killer”
She’s just a weary sleepy head.
Little Combat Chihuahua “Night night!”
copyright: Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta
In loving memory of Fawn
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/
Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.
I’m finding it magical that Bloganuary prompts are parallel to what I am experiencing in life. The next book on my reading list–and it will be on my front doorstep TODAY–is “Ten Arguments for Deleting Your Social Media Account Right Now” by Jaron Lanier.
I actually closed up my Facebook account a few days ago. I didn’t go as far as “deleting” the account because it has a Memories section, and there are almost 10 years of wonderful memories, in both photographs and words. It also has many links to articles I’ve written (I store the best on Contently, but even the non-epic ones are important to me).
People tell me I’m the one they can depend on for a compliment and that I see the beauty in everyone. It is true. People tell me their most wonderful secrets, like a weekend trip to Paris, because they know I’m not a jealous person and I’ll be happy for them. Seeing all these things on social media — friends/family having success and happiness, learning about gigs/events I want to go to, learning about new bands….The lists of positives is endless.
But then there is a downside. And it’s darker than anyone who isn’t on social media can imagine.
First, let me say, I never wanted to be on Facebook. A high school friend convinced me way back in 2010. Okay, I reconnected with a few old friends, but then didn’t hear from them anymore, even after we met for lunch a few times. It seemed silly to “follow” all these “friends” that you didn’t communicate with anymore. Their head shots on the bottom of my page made me think of deer heads on a wall. No rhyme or reason to it. I deleted the account.
Two years later, I wrote my first book and was encouraged by a client, whose book I was copy editing. She said, “You have to be on Facebook. You can promote your book in a big way.” She was right. My first book made the most money, until my fifth one came along and I received a cash advance to write it–a writer’s dream!
For the next several years, I enjoyed Facebook. Then they started adding more bullshit to the mere “thumb’s up.” Now you could “like” something or you can “LOVE” something by clicking on the heart button at the bottom of each entry. But you can also be angry or sad about something. (This worked well if you spoke about death. Who would give a thumb’s up to death, right?)
But then the “laugh” button. The most annoying of all. People misused it the the extreme. It was great if something was really funny, but it was used more in a condescending way, like if someone disagreed with your political stance. This, to me, was extremely childish. It was now awkward sharing views on the internet. No matter how diplomatic you would be, that ugly laugh button popped up. I’d rather have someone tell me I’m talking through my ass than to ever see that laugh button again!
A few years ago, I unfollowed all news on Facebook (and in general) as it was too depressing. For every feel good story, there were at least 10 bad ones. I did everything to make Facebook enjoyable, because face it, if you’re not on Facebook, you might as well not exist. Friends and family no longer call you for funerals. You have to catch the info in the Facebook feed. That never sat right with me, but when in Rome… So I unfollowed every page that posted negativity. I “hid” friends/family who spoke too much about politics. I only followed spiritual, animal, music, and vegan pages. It “worked” for awhile. I was able to use Facebook as a positive tool.
But then, over the weekend, I was innocently watching a video on The Dodo, via Facebook. The Dodo is a You Tube channel that shows happy stories about animals. Most often a hurt animal is rescued and has a positive ending. Not this time. I happened to see one where a woman was teasing a cat to get it riled up in order to be promoted by The Dodo to jack up “likes” on her Instagram “modeling” career. SHAME ON THE DODO!
This woman made it sound like she was a wonderful cat mom but this cat did not love her. It was a big joke. She teased the cat, put clothes on it (most cats hate that), and put while the cat was riled up, she held it in front of children and the cat took a swipe at them. This was not good news.
This woman had the cat since it was a kitten. For anyone who knows animals/pets–it’s up to YOU, the trainer/owner to make the cat behave. You don’t taunt animals. Good cat owners may take in a new cat or kitten. The kitten or cat may hiss in the beginning, but they come around with REAL LOVE, thoughtful training, and lots of patience. If the cat is still hissing at you, many years later, you are instigating it.
I stand by this. I am a certified feline behaviorist. Do not argue with me. Watch a few Jackson Galaxy videos before commenting. You will see how wonderful an “evil” cat can be. (Evil with quotation marks because cats are not evil, only people are).
So back to The Dodo. I made the mistake of writing to them that video was a fail. Why promote a woman who taunted a poor animal just to get Instagram success? This is not cool and never will be cool.Would it be okay to do this to a child?
While I got almost TEN THOUSAND likes for my comment. I got a backlash from people who hate cats (and animals in general). Nasty, cruel, despicable comments! One after the other after the other.
As a spiritual, happy person who sees the good in (almost)everyone, I was astonished how horrible these “people?” were. I was sick for three days thinking about animal cruelty. Who wanted to drown the cat. Who wanted to strangle it. Who wanted to slap it in the nose like a puppy. And who wanted to poison it with catnip 24/7. Oh, and how clever/funny they thought they were.
One by one I began blocking these people so I wouldn’t ever see there negativity again. When someone trolls on the internet, you shouldn’t engage with them. But the hate comments continued to a point it was impossible to keep up. And I didn’t want to keep up anymore. I was DONE. I just let it go, stopped looking, and said to myself, “You’re fighting with yourselves, I’m no longer on here. You’re your own victim. Your hate is killing you.”
Katy Perry once told a contestant on American Idol not to read negative comments. “It’s poison,” she said. She is right. Sadly, social media brings out the beast in people. And I can’t help but wonder–why? What possesses people to troll? Are they mad because of a failed relationship? Are they drunk? Are they depressed? Are they on drugs? Why are people so cruel on the internet? The answer is, because they can be.
While bad comments are unavoidable, especially for a writer–who hasn’t had a bad review?–you don’t have to put yourself right in the fire. There are other internet places to voice your opinion, like WordPress or Linked In, where the backlash won’t be so insane because it’s a more intellectual environment, for the most part.
So in order to get back to who I am, to my peaceful, zen-like (with a little sass) personality, I needed to get away from Facebook. To make it official, yes, like a flight attendant I announced my departure. I let everyone know because I followed many people I care about and wanted to keep in touch with. Off Facebook.
Three days later and I realize I am missing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!
What is your experience with social media? Share your comments below!
I look forward to reading this book, which will reiterate that I made the smartest decision.
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/
This question is irrelevant for me. I went through all the super powers I could think of and none of them appealed to me.
I don’t want to fly. My head is always in the clouds. What I need is to be grounded.
I don’t want x-ray vision. I want to make people happy, not embarrassed.
And I certainly don’t want to be invisible. I worked hard my whole life to be seen and heard.
But speaking of invisible, I once had a cat who sometimes thought he was. Derick was the first cat I owned when I was single and living alone. Since kittenhood he was extremely attached to me. He’d follow me from room to room. He’d sit on my lap almost the entire day as I worked. He’d be at my side while I relaxed. And God forbid I left the house. He’d sit on the window sill, awaiting my return. If I sat in my backyard, he’d be in the window mewing, demanding that I come back in the house.
I had another cat, Billy Cat. Billy was more shy. He hid often. But in his later years, he competed with Derick for my attention. However, Derick wouldn’t have it. There would be friction between them whenever Derick saw Billy near me or on my lap.
Sometimes, randomly, Derick would take a swat at Billy. Billy would meow so loud, it was like the scream of death. Then they’d get into a rumble. My husband and I often caught Derick just in time. His paw would rise up to swipe Billy, and both of us would say, “No….” in unison, dragging out the “o” to show we meant business without getting loud or yelling. Derick would immediately freeze and his paw was comically suspended in mid-air. Then he would put his head down, and walk away ashamed.
However, Derick was relentless and not one to give up. His future attacks on Billy wouldn’t be so obvious. He would creep slowly into the room, then hunch his body down low as he inched towards Billy, sneaking up on him. My husband caught him, just in time, and said, “Hey! You’re not invisible!”
We laughed so hard over our “invisible” cat.
But I will say, the two did have their loving moments. They slept together, groomed each other, and had many peaceful moments. When Billy got older and had trouble walking, due to arthritis, and later cancer, Derick was a concerned little cat brother and doted over Billy until his death at age 19. Two years later, Derick died. He was also 19.
Does your cat have a super power? I’d love to hear about it!
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/
Sugar, cane sugar, and brown sugar are not vegan. They are processed via a bone char filter, just like many alcoholic beverages. I share this because many so-called vegans shame others who eat meat, yet continue to drink alcoholic beverages without doing their homework. This is why veganism is a lifestyle, not a diet. You have to research, research, research. Oreos are said to be vegan. They are not because they have sugar. Always question vegan bakeries and vegan food. I used to not want to be “that person” but in my spiritual growth, I will be “that person” for the animals.
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is available for blogging, editing, and writing. She is also available for book signings and speaking engagements. She is now coaching aspiring writers via ZOOM.
Maryanne is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: Love Cats
I just got off the phone with a new vegan friend. We shared our stories of how we became vegan. I went first and told her mine was long-winded. It was refreshing to share my on-again/off-again journey with someone so sweet and unjudgmental.
As a child, I did not like meat. I’d hide it in my napkin or feed it to the dog. When I was 22, I decided to no longer eat meat. This was in the 1980s and back then if you were a vegetarian, you were looked at as if you had two heads. People thought it was weird that I wasn’t eating pizza. And if I was stressed and had some vegan candy, I’d hear rude comments, “What do you do when you really go off the deep end? Eat meat?”
But I put up with it. For 28 years. (And the comments were worse when I was a raw foodist for a few years, but that’s another story). During these 28 years of being vegetarian, I dabbled in veganism on and off.
Then I hit my 50th birthday and menopause was upon me. I began having dizzy spells and getting kind of sluggish. Three male nutritionists said I’d be better off with some meat. Against my better judgement, I said a prayer to the animals and began to consume grass-fed beef. But I continued to stay away from pork, lamb, and veal. For some time I followed the paleo diet and I did feel better.
Last year during the pandemic, something happened. I changed. For the better. I wasn’t sad or stressed about anything. My husband and I continued to thrive in our careers during the pandemic. However, I did feel a sense of loss because one of my best friends died, not of Covid, but a heart attack. The best thing I could do for dealing with it was look inward.
I used to meditate in the 1980s. I somehow came across the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza and started doing his meditations, and other ones–twice a day. What came out of it was not only being incredibly at peace, but having greater compassion for both people and animals. My husband and I had just took in a feral kitten that was abandoned. My bond grew so strong with the kitten and it led me to study feline behavior.
When I got my certificate, I was looking for a shelter to volunteer at. None of them got back to me. Perhaps because we’re still in a pandemic? I don’t know.
I started following more animal groups on Facebook, to continue learning about cats and other animals.
Pigs were always my favorite farm animal. Protecting them was my biggest concern during my original run with vegetarianism. I never paid much attention to cows. Then watching what loving creatures cows are, on Dodo videos and videos on vegan pages, it inspired me give up meat again.
Then a few months later, while on one of our vacations, my husband and I were in a sea aquarium. A stingray kept going over to him. It seemed they made a connection. Then I saw a beautiful octopus. He winked at me! I can’t eat octopus anymore, I thought to myself. I just can’t.
I’ve been to aquariums before, but this time, due to all the meditation I was doing, I was moved like never before. These are living beings and we are one with them. With that in my head, I decided to stop eating fish. Might as well give up rennetless cheese too. And a vegan was born. Cold turkey. It wasn’t a hard decision to make. All the time I was on the paleo diet, I never stopped buying cruelty free/vegan make-up products. I never stopped going to cruelty free/vegan hair salons. And I never drank alcohol that wasn’t vegan. Absolute Vodka and White Claw were always my go-to drinks.
My husband asked me if I was sure eating vegan was what I wanted to do. He pointed out that I was feeling great, that the dizzy spells stopped, and I was sleeping good. That was all true, so I decided to hire a vegan health coach to make sure I was doing it right this time. I now knew too much, and experienced too much to go back. For months I was following vegan pages on Facebook, educating myself. I saw vegans of all ages thriving on the diet. I knew if I tried one more time I would thrive too. And I wouldn’t go back.
With the health coach, I learned which supplements you needed, and was inspired to experiment with different colored vegetables. I also learned of a service called Imperfect Foods, where you can get cheaper organic produce because it may be bruised or look weird (like a carrot with two legs!)
Now, three months later, I am feeling fantastic and I even lost a few pounds–at age 58! My husband has been eating more vegan meals, and so are my friends when they are around me. I recently signed up as a volunteer for vegan group to help animals.
I’m so happy and at peace with myself. Each day has so much meaning. It’s another day to save animals.
Sometimes I beat myself up and wish I never listened to the nutritionists who told me that I’d benefit from eating some meat. I was a meat eater for almost six years. But I did learn from the experience. The most important lesson is that everyone is on their own journey. People eat meat for their own reasons. Who are we to judge? The best I can do as a vegan, is to humble myself and lead by example. I will never tell a meat eater he or she is a “murderer.” It’s not right. It’s not my business.
But I will go to restaurants and suggest vegan options. I will continue to support vegan companies. I will continue to talk about the fun vegan food I get to eat on weekends (because during the week, I’m a more serious vegan, natural as possible).
It feels good to enjoy oatmeal again, after shunning it for years. And making scrambled tofu brought me back to a beautiful place. It was one of my first favorite vegetarian dishes back in the 1980s.
My husband and I drove past a farm a few weeks ago. He said to the cows, “She’s saving your lives.”
It was a beautiful thing to hear. Yes, I am saving lives. And it feels like home.
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is available for blogging, editing, and writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements(via ZOOM during covid).She is now coaching aspiring writers via ZOOM.
Maryanne is the author of the following books:
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: Love Cats
For cat and kitten lovers, you may want to check out my book, “Love Cats.” It’s a fiction story that takes place in the 1980s. A spoiled rich girl meets a working class guy and falls madly in love. However, due to her immaturity, and selfishness, she takes that love for granted and messes up — big time. During the break-up, a kitten shows up at her doorstep, and shows her what it’s like to love unconditionally. Check it out here: LOVE CATS
Has a kitten ever changed your life? Let me know in the comments below! (Or simply share a picture of your cat or kitten!)
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.
She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. In addition to Love Cats, she is the author of the following books :
“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary
“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You
Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: Love Cats
Not once, but TWICE on television news this week, I heard about the study. And it’s a study that, for the life of me, I don’t get. But, yeah, I heard right, “Single women are less likely to date men with cats.” Don’t believe it? I wouldn’t have either, but I heard it with my own ears, and read it with my own eyes on many news sites. Here is just one: Women Are Less Likely to Date Men with Cats
In this study, men who had dating profiles with cats in the photo were viewed as less masculine and more neurotic.
I disagree. Men who love cats, or animals in general, are strong, good providers, fun to be around, intelligent, and sensitive. And I’m not only speaking about my husband, but the husbands/long term partners of my dearest friends. (And a few single men I’m friends with who love cats!)
When I was single, my cats were a great measure in choosing who was good for me. The great guys were the ones who bonded with my cats. Even if someone was not quite a match for me, I’ll still remember him as a good catch (for someone else) because of how he interacted with my cats. The losers…urgh, I’d like to forget them but who can forget when your cat pisses on the jacket of an asshole. Pretty funny! A very good cat who never misbehaved did that. He was letting me know in a subtle way, “beware” and he was right.
So why, now, the disconnect? What made women turn on cats, or more specifically, men with cats? I can understand if a woman had a bad experience with a cat. In fact, I imagined such a thing in my fictitious erotic novel, Love Cats — where a young woman hates cats because of a bad experience, which we don’t find out until later. She ends up dating a few cat guys and eventually gives cats a chance.
Any random girl can dislike cats for whatever reason. But an entire study of females being “anti-cat” is something I just can not understand.
Back in my day, girls met potential dates in bars/clubs. I caught the tail end of online dating, so I don’t have much experience there. Like other women, I did have my laundry list. But it never occurred to me to put an animal on the deal breaker list. My deal breakers included: no smoking, no one obsessed with sports, no mama’s boys, no one who is verbally/physically abusive.
But “no cats”? Why would that be in a dating profile?
Perhaps a woman would be jealous of a man’s relationship with a cat? (I actually addressed that issue in Love Cats!) It’s not that far-fetched. Women can be catty (pun intended!). This can actually be a red flag for a guy! If a woman is jealous of your pet, would she also be jealous of your future son or daughter? Hmmm…..
But, let’s get back to why guys who love cats are AWESOME. You see, the bottom line is, cats are not instant-lovers like dogs. You need to nourish them and spend time with them in order to get them to come out of their shell. And if a man can take an independent cat and turn him/her into a playful, needy, snuggly bunny who runs to the door like a dog when he comes home, that man is a keeper! I should know, I married a man bonds with cats like that! And though we don’t have kids, I can only imagine what a good father my husband would be. In many families, pets are the stepping stones to children! (But let’s not count the idiots who give up their pets when they have kids!) Good pet parents equal good parents, period! It simply makes sense.
Perhaps single ladies need to re-think their views on men with cats. They may be missing out on a great one — and staying single a lot longer than they want to.
Maryanne Christiano Mistretta is the loving cat mom to Nicholas Gray and Sammy “Whammy” Keane Clemens. Her book Love Cats is written under the pen name Krystianna Mercury and available from Flamingo Media.