dreams

All posts tagged dreams

Anti-Bullying Book Club!

Published April 7, 2019 by Maryanne

IMG_20190406_172624_591 (1)Say “yes” to acai bowls and “no” to bullying! (Photo by Sara Liptack)

I was so honored to be a part of an anti-bulling club this weekend!

Sara Liptack of the Little Free Library, Westfield, New Jersey, invited me to her home to discuss my book, “I Don’t Want to Be Like You” with young readers in the Westfield neighborhood.

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is about my experiences growing up in the 1970s and dealing with bullying throughout grade school and high school. The girls had a few weeks to read the book, but they all said they finished it in one or two sittings.

It was refreshing to be in the company of such inspirational young ladies who are all anti-bullying advocates and have dreams for a bright future.

What I’ve learned, unfortunately, is that when it comes to peer pressure and bullying, not much has changed in the last 40 years; especially now with the internet.

The good news is, the four girls I’ve spoken with were confident to be themselves and truly have it together when it comes to standing apart from the crowd, going after their dreams, and not worrying what others think of them.

One commented, “I can’t wait to go to college. I’m going to learn so much!”

I asked the girls what part of the book they liked best. Most agreed they liked the whole book, in general, and that it was a quick read. One young lady said her favorite part was when I started fighting back.

In a comfortable, private setting, everyone, including the adults Sara and myself, shared their experiences with bullying and how they handled it. It was an awesome event and a great learning experience.

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for motivational speaking engagements and is the author of the following books: 

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: Ten Ways to Become Your Own Hero” will be available October 2019. To pre-order, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

Giving Goals

Published January 19, 2019 by Maryanne

baby and mommyPhoto by Mistretta

People have been busy writing down their goals for 2019, which is great. Then it dawned on me, it would be awesome to have giving goals as well.

There are three ways to give: money, time, and sharing (in other words, being vulnerable). Below are ways to up the ante for all of them!

  1. Money. Even if you’re on a strict budget, money is the easiest way to give. You can put a dollar in a veteran’s can and get a free poppy. For some, it’s the best we can do, but I think in our hearts we always want to do more. In my younger days I know I did. When the basket went around in church and I was only able to spare a few dollars, I secretly longed for the day I could throw in a $20 bill or more. Then that day happened! My next goal was for the Go Fund Me pages. I wanted to give more than $50. And that happened too. As we earn more, we can focus more on giving to others. It’s great to share!
  2. Time. Time is a very precious thing to give someone because life is short. You hear so many stories about children who have had successful parents that were never around. This is a lesson to balance your time so you can be more giving to people you love. While being spontaneous is wonderful, it’s also important to balance your day so you can be able to balance your time. Since I work for myself, at home, I have the luxury of making my own hours. That said, there’s a time I plan to shut down and devote to my husband and cats. Of course I also like to donate my time to good causes, and fun stuff. But always remember, to take time for yourself because if you’re not healthy and happy, you won’t be able to make others happy. Then when you feel optimal, you can give time in so many ways–volunteering, listening, offering your help, surprising someone by doing something nice unexpectedly. The list goes on and on! With little money to spare, you can always be creative with your time. Or even if you have a lot of money, perhaps someone would appreciate your time more? It’s something to think about.
  3. Sharing/Being Vulnerable. Sharing and being vulnerable is the biggest and best way to give, in my humble opinion. Time and money are the easy way out because ego isn’t involved. But when you take the time to pour your heart out to someone who desperately needs to know he or she is not alone, that is GOLD! Many people are afraid to share because of their ego. They want to put on a facade that they are perfect. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times, the most inspiring people are the ones who are so free and open about sharing. They have truly made the world a better place. By “sharing” I don’t mean venting. I mean digging deep inside, no longer feeling the shame, and going with your heart and gut that by sharing something bad that happened to you, you are going to make another person feel not so alone! How great is that?! It takes a strong person to say, “Screw it, I’m going to try to help someone else. I don’t care if I am judged!” Anyone who has gone that route should be super proud of themselves. Put aside any shame you are feeling, because it’s not your fault that something bad happened to you if some loser took advantage of you. Because it’s a horrible person who should feel the shame–not YOU! So if you want to be a better friend, or a better person in general, make a point to get vulnerable. It’s the greatest way to give! You never know who you may help!

What do you think? What are your giving goals for 2019?

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta is a motivational speaker and the author of “I Don’t Want to Be Like You” which addresses her experiences with being bullied. You can order the book from Amazon here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

Her next book “BeExtraordinary” will be published in October 2019 by KiCam. To pre-order or visit the landing page, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

To book Maryanne for a speaking engagement, contact her at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com

Be (Extra)Ordinary: Ten Ways to Become Your Own Hero

Published January 9, 2019 by Maryanne

kicam cover

I am ecstatic to reveal the cover, and the landing page of my upcoming book Be (Extra)Ordinary: Ten Ways To Become Your Own Hero, published by KiCam!

Release date is October 2019, and you can order yours today here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta is an international author and speaker. She is available for events. For availability and pricing, contact: maryannechristiano@gmail.com 

She is also a professional blogger, book editor and ghost writer. Contact today for rates: maryannechristiano@gmail.com 

I Dreamed My Cat Was Alive

Published September 6, 2015 by Maryanne

Billy in the SkyBilly Cat, in Heaven on the Rainbow Bridge

September 3, 2013, my beloved Billy Cat passed away. He was 19. This is the blog I wrote on that horrible day: https://maryannemistretta.wordpress.com/2013/09/03/goodnight-beautiful-angel/

For the past two years, I was always sad during the reunion date of his death. Billy was not just a cat, he was family, as you can read in the previous blog.

Last night I believe I was on the Rainbow Bridge, as our baby came back to us in a dream.

It was so realistic, Billy was alive again. The dream felt like a dream. I thought he was a ghost visiting us on his death date. Then it was several days — maybe 20? I said to my husband, “Billy is still here.”

He said, “Don’t question it, just enjoy Billy.”

I said, “There has to be an answer for this.”

Then my husband said that Billy never died. When he was sick he put him under a tree. He heard about neighbors talking about “a cat.” Billy came home to us. He was better and alive.

When I woke up in the middle of the night, my heart was racing. I really thought Billy was alive! Then I realized, my husband never put Billy “under a tree.” We were together on that sad day we brought him to the vet and had no choice but to put him to sleep. Our baby had bone cancer and was down to four pounds. It was the humane thing to do.

I woke my husband up and told him about the dream. We hugged.

I went back to sleep and dreamed:

I saw a cat in the back seat of someone’s car. I opened the car door and there was a key. I turned it so the car could be warm for the cat. It was dark and again — the cat looked like Billy Cat.

Neighbors came out and I told them I wasn’t stealing the car, I just wanted the cat to be warm. A woman picked up the cat and his dark tiger stripes turned orange. It wasn’t Billy.

I woke up again and was so happy that Billy was on my mind so much that I got to dream about him. It was like having my little guy back, even if it wasn’t real, the surreal Billy was extremely rewarding to have.

Damn, I miss that little guy! ❤

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta is the author of “Love Cats” available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle editions: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1681020513

Thoughts and Dreams (An Author’s Pre-Publish Excitement and Jitters)

Published May 18, 2015 by Maryanne

Darlene - Hallowed GroundPhoto of me, by Darlene Foster

I’ve always been of the mindset that we all have psychic powers within us and are able to guide ourselves through life by messages from the universe. I use these techniques in various ways. Because when we open our eyes, the signs are always there right in front of us. One time I was very sad about something and on a very windy day, a piece of light cardboard with a photo on it appeared in my backyard. The cardboard looked like a CD cover. I picked it up and it was a perfume called “Angel.” I took it as an omen that an angel was telling me things were going to be alright. And they were.

For the past few months I’ve been trying to self-publish my second book, “Love Cats.” I’m incredibly tense about it because it’s my first work of fiction and has four major sex scenes since it’s about singles in their 20s. As a former writer for “Screw” and “Gasm” I must say these are not your boring cliche simultaneous orgasm modern romance novel sex scenes. These are sex scenes as people really have sex … fumbling for condoms, or the WIO method, nervousness, trying to unhook bras, first time same-sex experiences … you get the picture. Nothing is left to the imagination. So you can see why I’m nervous about getting this stuff published.

“Love Cats” also deals with parental neglect, heartache, friendship break-ups and a main character who is unkind to animals. The more I re-read my book, the more frightened, yet anxious I am about having it published. Frightened because though it has it’s humorous situations, it’s incredibly intense.

The intensity reached my subconscious in sleep last night, when a beautiful brunette woman came to me, smiling, and wanting to be friends. I had no idea who she was. This image continued to haunt me throughout the morning as I tried to figure out who she was. Then when I was looking up famous musicians birthdays for the day, I saw that it was the birthday of Martika. I was unfamiliar with her work, except for the song “Toy Soldiers.” I Googled what she looked like, and that was the girl in my dream! So I searched for the answers in “Toy Soldiers” and immediately after reading the lyrics, I felt the pain of the characters in my fictitious “Love Cats.” Beck and Janey, loved so deeply and were going through a rough time, with much heartache and tears … something I haven’t known in ages since I am so happily ecstatic with my husband and soul mate.

I had to dig to the darkest corners of my soul to come up with these feelings expressed in “Love Cats.” How I felt, hurt in my 20s, and then exaggerated it ten-fold in order to creative good fiction because in my 20s I had such a “devil may care” attitude about everything bad that happened to me. I didn’t know real pain until I reached my 30s. After the death of my grandmother, it was like, so this is what heartache really feels like.

“Toy Soldiers” could have been a perfect accompaniment to my soundtrack for “Love Cats” even though it’s not in the new wave/dark wave genre of other work I’ve included such as Iggy Pop, The Cure, Joy Division, Kate Bush and so on …

As I was making friend with the woman in my dream, I’m making “friends” with what her song represents — that yeah, this book is harsh and I just have to take a deep breath and just put it out there. JUST LET GO!

Oh, and there is part two.

Also in the dream was a friend of a friend I lost touch with. Why was this person in the dream? We barely ever spoke to each other. But the cool thing was, we respected each others work. I always loved the bands this guy played in. And he came to one of my live poetry presentations and said he liked it. When I used to be on Face Book, this same person gave me the “thumbs up” when my first book, “On the Guest List: Adventures of a Music Journalist” was published. So I looked him up. He was easy to find because does a lot. He’s also less than six degrees separated from Iggy Pop … which is another connection to “Love Cats” because as I noted before, I wrote to Hal Leonard to gain permission to use Iggy’s lyrics in “Mass Production.”

So what this is all telling me is that all roads are leading to “Love Cats.”

“Love Cats” “Love Cats” “Love Cats” — that is all that’s been on my mind all day and night as I wait to get my paperback copy to approve in the mail. Hopefully this week. And hopefully, if goes as planned, pre-sales will be on Barnes & Noble Store and Amazon THIS WEDNESDAY!

I’m obsessively imagining who I’d love to play my characters in a movie. In spite of my descriptive words and what the book cover illustrates, I dream of a young Laura Leighton as my leading lady, Janey Peyton. Just both her in some goth clothes and she’s good to go.

laura leightonLaura Leighton

And the late Razzle from Hanoi Rocks is definitely the look I want for my Beck Stewart character. Let’s undead him for my movie! Beck is the hard-working, humble romantic who is madly in love with Janey.

Razzle-hanoi-rocks-34007384-400-574

Razzle (Hanoi Rocks)

I’d also want to go back in time, to get a very young Nicolas Cage to play Adam Durian, the eccentric, egotistical famous rock photographer. This character was so grand, he just had to be named after a fruit such as the Durian — a fruit that makes an entrance.

nicolas cageNicolas Cage

Then there is Morticia (or “Tish Girl” as Beck calls her) the green-eyed black Maine Coon, who is Beck’s pride and joy. Problem is, Janey hates cats. Can this beautiful little bugger change her mind?

black-smoke-maine-coon-cat

Maine Coon cat

And what happens when a little orange fur ball shows up on Janey’s doorstep during her darkest hour? Does she turn a blind eye to a kitten in need? Or does she remain a cat hater?

Pumpkin

Little Pumpkin

Is anyone enticed for the soon to be released “Love Cats”?

back cover proof CORRECTLove Cats back and front cover

 COMING SOON ON AMAZON AND BARNES & NOBLE STORE!

(KINDLE TOO!)

Dreaming is Not Drugs

Published February 8, 2015 by Maryanne

fireworks by MaryanneFireworks by Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta

Honestly, the only time a friend should stop another friend from doing something is if they are harming themselves. And the first thing that comes to mind is — drugs.

Other than that, anything anyone wants to do, it’s their life they should be encouraged by a good friend — or anyone for that matter — to follow their dreams! Unlike drugs, dreams are healthy and if you can make them come true, even better!

Years ago, I was working as a journalist in the newspaper industry. I was living on my own for about 15 years and to cut corners I used mass transit instead of having a car and insurance payments. It wasn’t a problem and I never wanted for nothing — I had both a bus stop and a train station within my block.

When I was dating my future husband for about a year, we decided to move in together. He lived in a house in an area that mass transit was lacking, so I needed a car. My husband drove a PT Cruiser and I fell in love with it. I wanted my own.

My biggest mistake was casually sharing my dream with a co-worker. This woman shot me down immediately saying, “Ew, those cars are so uncomfortable!” From that moment on, I avoided this woman like the plague.

How dare she rain on my parade! If I felt the car was uncomfortable when I took it for a test drive, I wouldn’t get the car, right? Common sense, no? I did not need her ugly opinion and to this day I will never forget how crappy she treated me when I was excited about something. Needless to say, I ended up getting a PT Cruiser and enjoying it for several years before I got a new car!

It’s so sad that people are more in a bad habit of cutting people’s dreams down instead of just going with it. We’re all individuals and have different dreams and desires. Many people have dreams that are different than mine, but I won’t insult their dreams, I’ll always be happy for someone when they get something they want in life.

It’s not being “dishonest” if you are encouraging to someone who shares their dreams with you and you don’t necessarily agree with them. It’s being a good person — being someone who can take their mind off of themselves for one frigging moment and tell another person that you are proud of them or ecstatic for them!

If you’re not in the habit of doing this, regularly, I highly suggest you start. Because being a “Debbie Downer” makes a person undesirable.

My husband recently shared with me that he thinks “everyone” love me. I laughed because sometimes it doesn’t seem that way. I’ve had many people shoot down my dreams and it makes me secretly wonder if that’s their way of telling me they don’t like me. Or maybe they just have diarrhea mouth and are vomiting their hate using me as a punching bag. And that doesn’t feel too good, so that’s when I start avoiding people (like I avoided the co-worker many years ago).

Think about it. If you want a positive person to like you and want to be in your company, be that same positive person! Don’t shoot down people’s dreams. Unlike drugs, dreams are a good thing. Dreams are what get us out of bed in the morning. Dreams are what lift people out of a depressive state. Dreams are what keep us young.

Friends let friends dream!

Doing the Mouse in my Sleep

Published January 4, 2013 by Maryanne

Soupy SalesThe late, great Soupy Sales

I’ve written before that I believe in dreams and omens.

Twice in my life, I heard the song, “The Mouse” by Soupy Sales in a dream, which was a childhood favorite song of mine. The first time I was taking a nap in the afternoon. I dreamed of the entire song that I had in my record collection as a little girl. In the dream the song played exactly as it did on the record, with the skips and all, from start to finish.

This was back in 2005, the first year I was with Dennis. It was a very happy, carefree time in my life and after that “Mouse” dream, life was just off the hook ecstatic with lots of fun times ahead.

Last night I dreamed of “The Mouse” again! This time I was hosting a radio show with two of my clients and “The Mouse” was one of the songs I played.

I take that as another omen of a fun ride ahead! This time in business! In the upcoming weeks I’ll be starting a brand new agenda with both new and old clients. I’ll be doing promotional and writing work with health care practitioners and continuing to promote my musicians. It will be a variety, working with fun/upbeat people.

You can follow my home-based business career by tuning into my website: www.peartreeenterprises.com. If you go to the archives you can see how much business grew and changed over the past four years that I’ve been doing this. Come this summer, it will be five years that I’ve been in business for myself after leaving a career in journalism (which I still pursue from time to time, writing for various magazines and online newspapers).

Clients come and go and come back. That’s the nature of it. There are periods of Pear Tree where I am just going through the motions of having a home-based business, grateful to be doing this, but then there are periods when I am absolutely thrilled to be alive because I’m working with my favorite people, doing stuff I really love and every day is super exciting. This is now one of them and I’m beyond joyful that it’s happening for me again!

And, here is “The Mouse” to listen to so maybe it can stick in your head too, bring you a fun dream, with fun stuff in life to follow!