happiness

All posts tagged happiness

A Toast to Say Good-bye to 56!

Published August 18, 2020 by Maryanne
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Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta
A toast to say good-bye to a great age, 56! ❤
Today is my last day of age 56; tomorrow I will be 57. I’ve always been a person who looked forward to aging, not against it.
I’m always a person who lives by love and trust, not hope and fear.
My 56th year was a beautiful one. The summer of 2019 was a great one. And I had some kick-ass memories, like promoting at trade shows during autumn, performing my poetry live (something I haven’t done since the 1990s — and thanks to Toastmasters, I memorized all my words). The Covid pandemic hit USA in March of 2020, but that didn’t break my spirit. Loved ones stayed safe, and my business Pear Tree was thriving — and continues to thrive. Dennis and I loved the lock-down, and for the very first time we’ve created together and made a music video, my singing debut, which we’ve shared with many friends. AND during this time, the second edition of my fiction book “Love Cats” came out! I also gave some incredible ZOOM classes which were very well-received.
The saddest thing that happened this year, or any year for that matter, was losing one of my best friends, Vinnie Bordogna. It was one of my biggest losses ever. And I’ve yet to move on, and doubt I ever will.
For my 57th birthday, I asked the Universe for two special wishes–one of them came true already! (Stay tuned, you will know in September). Good-bye to age 56, it was one of my favorite years! (So thanks to everyone who said, last year, “Best Birthday Ever.” — you blessed me for an entire year!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. In addition to Love Cats, she is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: Love Cats

Visit Maryanne’s You Tube Channel here: Be YOUnique

The Universe Speaks

Published May 5, 2020 by Maryanne

beyond-the-blue-horizon-my-photoTwilight photo by Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta

If you don’t believe in miracles, stop reading. If you do, carry on…

You always hear tales about rock stars or celebrities predicting their fame. But common people don’t share enough of their every day miracles–that they manifested by the positives that came directly from their own mouth.

One of the most beautiful examples, in my life, was back in late 2005. A relationship ended with yet another loser (though to be fair, I did have some cool boyfriends when I was single, some I am still friends with). After that break-up, my mother said to me, “You should be like me, just be alone.”

Easy for her to say, she was 62, but I was only 42 and did not want to spend the rest of my life alone. I simply blurted, “No, there is someone out there for me!”

Two months later I met the man who ended up being my husband, the love of my life, my rock, and loving cat daddy!

That was one of the bigger miracles and I feel another big one is about to manifest.

Everyone who is artistic and in the public eye, knows how hard it is to elevate your career from point A to point B. The process isn’t an overnight success, but moves so slowly it can feel like you’re going backward instead of going forward. But if you pay attention to the signs, you can see you ARE going forward, especially when you see things being left behind.

For example, when I first started as a public speaker, back in 2014, it was in assisted living facilities. I lectured seniors on health and history; and eventually had a “Learn & Listen” series where I’d speak about the life of a famous entertainer, followed by live music! Speaking at the assisted livings elevated to libraries. This went on for another six years.

Over the years I’ve learned that when you book something in the winter, you have to have a rain/snow date. But COVID19 reschedules don’t cut it because no one knows what the future brings. But let’s back up a bit …

As much as I loved doing gigs at the libraries, and all the beautiful memories I’ve had, once my library gigs canceled, one by one, due to COVID19, I took it as a blessing in disguise.

You see, I’ve become such a good speaker, it’s only natural that I wanted to elevate to the next step. I’ve outgrown libraries and began dreaming of the day when I’d no longer be doing the library gigs. In fact, while booking one of my gigs (which is hard work, but I never found someone I could connect with to do it for me), I blurted out to a librarian, “I won’t be doing this much longer. I’m going to be moving on to schools and universities.”

Sure enough, a week ago I had a phone meeting with a university. I’m going to be conducting lectures/classes/workshops online! This may start as soon as June! It’s a magical manifestation that I made happen.

In this day and age, with so many believing in The Secret, Law of Attraction, positive thinking, elevating yourself, and going after the gold, this story is not as “out there” as someone many have believed in the 1980s. (Though I must say, some are still stuck there!)

If something comes out of your mouth that seems a bit strange, or unlike you, it just may be from the universe, giving you the nudge you need!

Has this ever happened to you? Share your stories!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

“The Gypsy Smiled” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Gypsy-Smiled-Maryanne-Christiano-Mistretta-ebook/dp/B074VC7MT9

Loving the Lock Down!

Published March 23, 2020 by Maryanne

DSCF4759Outside, at least six feet away from the rest of the world

My husband and I are very social people. We don’t let any grass grow under our feet. We’re the types who are always going to parties, getaways, restaurants, and concerts; and double dates with other couples.

But on the other hand, we can be homebodies too. Some of our best memories include being stranded at home during Hurricane Sandy, snowstorms, very cold weather, and when one of us is sick.

So staying home like good citizens during the Corona Virus pandemic is not a bad thing for us. We’re enjoying the down time tremendously and the days are going faster than we’ve imagined.

And why shouldn’t we be enjoying ourselves? If this pandemic taught us anything, it’s that our precious lives can end with the blink of an eye. We’ve lived each day to the fullest before, so why not now?

We’ve fallen into this great groove where we’ll spend a little time outdoors on nice days (six feet away from others). I’ll pick up groceries once a week at my favorite natural market; and he’ll get the extras during the week.

As a public speaker who has lost all my recent gigs, I’m keeping up my speaking chops by creating You Tube videos every day. They are all Corona Virus themed and are meant to inspire others. Or accidentally be funny. For example, today I made a video to honor National Puppy Day, and spoke about how pets can soothing to us at such a crazy time. However, unbeknownst to me, my cats photo bombed, with the one sniffing the butt of the other! It was so funny, how could I not share?! Check it out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onipyTq0q1g&t=2s

It’s nice to wake up in the morning with my husband and not have to be on a schedule. I like to write in my journal, give myself a facial, and then have our coffee together indulging in great conversation before I work out.

In between our creative projects and preparing meals, we’ll watch a little TV, listen to music, laugh, dance, sing, call our friends/family, and play with our kitties. Before retiring for the night I like to do a little reading.

We do stuff together, as well as give ourselves space. I’m very blessed to have married someone I could call my best friend. And someone I enjoy being locked down with.

This is a scary, and stressful time since we don’t know what’s going to happen next. And it’s great to have someone by your side, so get through it with.

Of course I’m looking forward to getting back to “normal” but in the meantime, this ain’t so bad.

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

“The Gypsy Smiled” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Gypsy-Smiled-Maryanne-Christiano-Mistretta-ebook/dp/B074VC7MT9

Why You SHOULD Work With Friends

Published January 26, 2020 by Maryanne

Darlene Asbury Park

The Friends That Create Together, Stay Together! 

Pictured in photo, left, Darlene Foster, right Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta

URGH! A few days ago I overheard someone utter that dreadful cliche, “You shouldn’t work with friends.” Yeah, say that to Mick Jagger and Keith Richards!

Like the Glitter Twins, I’m here to prove that silly saying wrong. Hear me out…

I’ve found my magical “glitter twin” in not only my husband, but in many friends! But before I share the magic, here are my top reasons why it’s best to work with friends/lovers:

  • You already like/love each other, so you are off to a good start. There’s no tension, no “breaking the ice,” and the competitiveness is healthy — you want each other to succeed.
  • True friends/true lovers are NOT jealous of each other.
  • You thrive off of your creative differences.
  • You move ahead faster because you know each other well.
  • Celebrations of success are that much sweeter.

Working with someone you don’t know very well (or don’t like) never brings a project to fruition. Countless times I’ve stopped editing or ghost writing a book because I couldn’t stand the person I was working with. I’ve had dream jobs I’ve quit because my co-workers were the pits (and came out ahead of the game with the next job or project – go me!)

So, if someone tells you it’s not a good idea to work with a friend or a lover, I’m here to prove them wrong. Of the hundreds of friend/lover collaborations I’ve done over the years, here are a handful of my random favorites (in no particular order).

The Hounds of Winter “Come On Christmas”  

The above video was made possible by people in my circle who are all forever connected, Ric Pink; vocals; Tom DiPaolo: guitars; Dennis Mistretta (my husband): bass; Tom Corea: drums; and I did backing vocals at the last minute. Oh, and my good friend Darlene Foster (long-time girlfriend of the guitarist Tom DiPaolo) created the cover art. The CD was made in 2012. Note, sometimes Tom Corea’s wife Carol plays instruments on the CDs too.

Seltzer’s Rainbow Heart 

Editing “Seltzer’s Rainbow Heart” for my good friend Jayne DiGregorio, was super fun. It was the beginning of many projects we have done together. I’ve helped her promote the book, wrote about her Care Bear non-profit for newspapers, and we worked together on other projects too. Working together was never a problem, it only brought us closer.

Darlene Foster 

Ten years ago I modeled for my artist/photographer friend Darlene Foster. And some of the photos sold too! Since then she’s designed two of my book covers, and is a current participant in my upcoming book, “Fantastic without Plastic” (a book about positive, attractive women who look/feel amazing while shunning plastic surgery and Botox).

And while my husband is a humble person who doesn’t like to be called out in blogs or on Facebook, I have to override him this time to say that he’s the one person I can count on who ALWAYS (and I do mean ALWAYS) reads my articles. He comes to as many of my speaking engagements as he can (and gives me rides too!) and cheers me on when I come up with new ideas. When I’m feeling down, he’s the one I can count on to remind me, I’ve got a name.

Can you get all that from a mere acquaintance or someone in an office you barely know?! ABSOLUTELY NOT!

And all that said, if I need to work with someone, I will call on a my husband or a friend first! I know they are reliable, fun, hard-working, and creative. It’s a joyful existence for sure!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

“The Gypsy Smiled” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Gypsy-Smiled-Maryanne-Christiano-Mistretta-ebook/dp/B074VC7MT9

 

 

 

 

 

 

Poetry Reading at Neighborhood House Association, Plainfield, NJ

Published November 24, 2019 by Maryanne

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Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta (left), with coordinator/host, Carolyn M. Gourdine

November 24, 2019, Carolyn M. Gourdine hosted an amazing event I was so proud to be a part of the Leading By Mission Pop-Up Shop, and read my poetry along with other poets, comedians, musicians, and deejays.

I read two poems and have them uploaded on You Tube, on my Be YOUnique station. Note, I don’t have children, so not sure how “family friendly” they are since I casually mention “sex” and a “no bra day.” So for 18+ only!

“All About Eve” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyLorsfQig4

“Never a Dull Day” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyiNL6ChEEI&t=1s

Both videos were made by Jayne DiGregorio (https://www.jaynedigregorio.com/)

Follow Leading by Mission here: https://www.facebook.com/leadingbymission/

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

 

World Kindness Day

Published November 13, 2019 by Maryanne

Be Extra-Ordinary

#worldkindnessday

Happy World Kindness Day! In my new book, there’s an entire chapter dedicated to kindness. “Be Kind” begins on page 51!

Order HERE: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero

Published October 17, 2019 by Maryanne

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I am thrilled to announce that my fifth book, published by KiCam is now available!

For your copy, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing, and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

And check out her anti-bullying You Tube channel, Be YOUniquehttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA?view_as=subscriber

Anti-Bullying Book “I Don’t Want to Be Like You” Now Available on Audiobooks!

Published June 21, 2019 by Maryanne

BookCoverPreview Mistretta

I am ecstatic that my book “I Don’t Want to Be Like You” published by Higher Ground Books & Media, is now available on AUDIO! (https://www.audible.com/pd/I-Dont-Want-to-Be-Like-You-Audiobook/B07TB2VKWY?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-155390&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_155390_rh_us)

Sarah Staton is the voice who made my story come to life!

My book takes place growing up in the 1970s when I was bullied in both grade school and high school. And I’m sad to say, that even in this day and age bullying continues. Children are committing suicide because of assholes who have not yet evolved. Adults are secretly emailing me, “Write something about bullying in the workplace.”

It makes me so angry that 50 years later, it’s not getting better but worse.

Bullies target those who are unique; those who speak up for themselves; those who are shy; those who are creative; those who are very smart and think out of the box; those who don’t follow the crowd; and those who are very good looking. If you recognize yourself in any of those words, you most likely were a target for a bully. Because victims are often so smart and creative, they also carry around insecurities. Smart and creative people never feel good enough. You know that old saying, a genius never sees himself as one. Bullies pick up on this and attack.

The good news is, there is no reason at all to feel shame. It’s not you, it’s them. Bullies are the ones who feel hurt, sad, unloved, ugly, dumb, so they target others to make themselves feel big. Bullies are also masters at gas lighting (making others think THEY are the ones who are crazy). It’s a manipulative way for a bully to “win.”

Truth be told, all bullies are losers. If you can’t come from a place of love, you’ll never evolve. And isn’t evolution the ultimate goal? 

I recently sent out a call for speaking engagements. I let everyone know I am READY to speak out against bullying — in libraries, schools, corporations — and I will travel.

One of the responses I received was that bullying isn’t going away.

I did not know how to answer that. From what I wrote above, you may think I agree that it’s not going away. But hear me out, I now believe differently.

I was speaking to someone in a health food store earlier today. This man asked me if I was a vegan.

I said, “No, but I eat vegan for several days at a time.” I further explained I was a vegetarian/vegan for 28 years, from ages 23 to 51. Then I started eating meat (grass-fed only, and some chicken — no pork or veal!) to get my health in order. (I went from having low blood sugar, thyroid issues, low white blood cell count, very low blood pressure/borderline anemic as a vegetarian to a person of perfect health with some meat back in my body!)

After hearing my story, my new vegan friend thanked me for being one of the leaders in the movement back in the day when it was HARD. Now it’s easy! There are more vegans than ever and you can get vegan food anywhere. But in 1986, I was considered a “weirdo” for not eating meat.

What does this have to do with bullying, you may ask? 

You see, over 30 years ago, people didn’t get vegetarians. But we’ve evolved. Now we get it. And people are health conscious and accepting. The smarter ones are getting along in harmony. THIS can happen with bullying too!

At age 55, I see myself having at least another good 30 years on this planet, in this body I rented. In the year 2049, I TRULY BELIEVE, bullying will be on its way to extinction. We will evolve and change the world. Bullies will be the new neanderthals … so over. People who love will no longer be the weirdos. They will be the WINNERS! The meek will surely inherit the earth.

I CAN’T WAIT!

In the meantime, please purchase my book or audio book, it may save your child’s life when he or she hears about how I was bullied, but grew up to be successful and happy!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing, and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: Ten Ways to Become Your Own Hero” will be available October 2019. To pre-order, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

 

The Happy Writer!

Published May 20, 2019 by Maryanne

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Putting down an author just because they are not YET a “best-selling” author is a poor man’s mindset. It’s those who do not give up who win. Even if they don’t become best-selling authors, sustainability accounts for something too. Royalty checks, book signing events, and interviews on radio shows all add up. Getting offers to write blogs from all over the world and helping people write books to make their dreams come true is a blessing. It’s super fun earning money while you sleep too!
I’m living the dream and have been earning a living as a writer since 1995! I’ve been in magazines all over the world. I’ve interviewed some of the most incredible people including Henry Winkler, Tommy James, and Peter Murphy. 
I’ve had free meals in restaurants all over New York City. I’ve been on the guest list at countless concerts. And best of all, it doesn’t feel like WORK because I LOVE what I do.
Unstoppable with no plans of retiring! Because if I stop living my dream, I will DIE inside! 
So, when you meet a writer, do not ask them if they are a Best-selling author. A better question is “Are you happy?” And be prepared for an answer that will give you the greatest contact high ever!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing, and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books (which both mention how she was inspired by Freddie Mercury): 

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: Ten Ways to Become Your Own Hero” will be available October 2019. To pre-order, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

Friendships Need Attention Too

Published May 14, 2019 by Maryanne

IMG_8542Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta

I’m one of the happiest people on the planet. I married a man I adore, and who adores me. I love my career. And I have amazing friendships.

The friendships I love best are the ones you don’t have to second guess. My best friendships are the ones that make a plan to get together. No “pencil in” plans — real plans that pan out. From lunch dates to afternoon Broadway play dates to double-dates with our significant others to spa days. It’s all good!

Everyone is so busy, including myself. In my case, it’s career. In the cases of others, it’s most likely family. And in some both.

I’m by no means a “needy” person, but like romantic relationships, friendships need attention too. There are my “top” friends I see several times a year — usually to celebrate our birthdays. Those same friends I can call if I need a shoulder to cry on. Then there are other friends I see from time to time. Or call on the phone to chat because we don’t see each other as much. Then there are the friends who I don’t see much, or even talk on the phone too, but they all support me on Facebook (there are quite a few I can count on to press the “like” button if I’m promoting an event or a book). Those friends are the ones who actually take the time to read my blogs and my books! (That’s quite extraordinary in this day and age when no one seems to read). They’ll never realize how happy they make my mornings when I log on to Facebook.

But then there are those who seem to be neglectful. You can’t really call them friends because they don’t act like friends. They don’t answer emails. They don’t return phone calls. They just don’t go out of their way for you in general.

They may give you a random “like” on Facebook, but only after you’ve “liked” something on their page. You support their events, but they never show up at yours. You send them cards for holidays, yet never get one back.

It may feel like you are chasing a person. You may wonder what you’ve  done wrong. Why is everything else so important in their lives than answering a quick email?

If someone doesn’t tend to their friendship, it’s a way of saying, “I don’t care.” People prioritize their jobs, their families, and their children, and put friendships on the low priority list. Or maybe just YOUR friendship because they seem to get along wonderfully with other people.

How many times do you continue to reach out or overlook? Do you bring it to their attention? I wouldn’t. Here’s why …

In the past I did. I’ve noticed a trend that people who are neglectful in friendships have another major flaw … they don’t like hearing that they are neglectful. They get defensive, or worse, downright nasty. Perhaps they were looking for a fight by ignoring you in the first place? That’s not friendship. That’s being manipulating. By making you feel wrong for questioning the friendship and making you feel like you’re needy and expect too much … that’s called gas lighting.

This taught me to take “neglect” as a red flag. If someone isn’t paying attention to you, it’s because they don’t care about you. Friendships are a lot like dating. Read the old classic, “Maybe He Just Isn’t Into You.”

So, do what you have to. Whether it’s friends or even relatives, if friendships are not nurtured, you can’t call them friendships. It’s a team effort and no fun to play by yourself.

Cut ties with those who don’t care. And don’t feel bad about it. Because they sure don’t. (Until you bring it to their attention. Then all hell will break loose).

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for motivational speaking engagements and is the author of the following books: 

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: Ten Ways to Become Your Own Hero” will be available October 2019. To pre-order, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261