motivation

All posts tagged motivation

A Client’s Dog Almost Bit Me

Published October 13, 2022 by Maryanne
Photo by insung yoon on Unsplash

I love animals.

Though I am a cat person, I love dogs too.

I’m the person dogs run up to in the streets, begging for a kiss. I get down on my knees and they slobber all over me. Owners apologize, but I LOVE doggy kisses!

About a month ago I scored a new client for a project that couldn’t be done remotely.

I was ecstatic to see the client had a little doggie. Immediately I was rubbing the dog’s belly during a free in-house consult which I offer all potential clients..

During the consult, the client wanted to see pictures of my kitties. When I handed the phone to her, the dog flipped out and began barking. It scared the shit out of me. Obviously passing a phone over a dog’s head was not a good idea. Nevertheless, I took on the project, assuming this was a one-time incident.

I was wrong.

Shortly afterwards, there was another incident. I was working for awhile and then got up to use the bathroom. The dog ran up to me, growled and jumped up to my stomach and grabbed my shirt with his teeth. I was terrified. I never had an experience like this in my life.

As a professional, I tried to work through my fears and continued to see the client. Whenever I was there, the dog barked and whimpered while contained in a large cage. The client caved and took the dog out on a leash. Often when the dog saw me, he barked and growled. It freaked me out. I’ve had other clients with dogs and cats. Never a problem.

When a neighbor came to visit, she shared that the dog nipped her!

A few more incidents happened, but I will not get into it. You get the picture.

I started to get a guilt complex and thought I was doing something wrong. I began having nightmares. Do I have a fear of dogs? Should I see a therapist for this “problem”? After much research, and chatting with friends who owned dogs, the answer was no. The problem wasn’t me, but the client.

Here is why:

  1. Dogs need to be trained and socialized, early on, not spoiled.
  2. The dog owner is the master. When dogs bark at guests, there should be a signal, telling the dog to stop. A dog should not jump on guests. (Note, if a dog is friendly, I LOVE when he/she jumps on me. It’s adorable! But when they are growling and showing teeth, that is not a good sign).
  3. If a guest is afraid of your dog, it’s not on them, it’s on you. Keep the dog contained in an area so your guest can feel safe. Holding a dog on a leash, isn’t good enough.

Two days after getting down on myself for this experience, I came to my senses. I am NOT afraid of dogs, only dogs that are territorial and not trained properly. Soon afterwards, I pet two dogs in the street that I never saw before. I got sweet kisses from them. I felt safe. And happy.

Yes, I love dogs. I am not afraid of dogs. That is my truth. I won’t let one bad experience define me as an animal lover. There are no bad dogs; only uneducated dog owners.

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Visit my business page, Pear Tree Enterprises, at: https://peartreeenterprises.wordpress.com/

I Can Do That!

Published September 22, 2022 by Maryanne
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta

The above photo was from Tuesday night. I was in anticipation of another outdoor summer concert, but reflecting back to a few days prior when I saw one of my idols, Patti Smith, perform at Count Basie Theatre.

It was one of many concerts I saw of her. And this one was more thrilling because I was accompanied by my husband, who never saw her before and really enjoyed himself.

Since then, I’ve been on a binge watching everything Patti Smith on You Tube. As much as I love her music, I especially love her interviews. She’s a wise sage; a warrior.

One interview in particular touched me. It illustrated how we can manifest our own destinies. She said after seeing Jim Morrison on stage, she said, “I could do that.”

Four powerful words can take us to the next level fierce. When we believe in ourselves, we can tap into something inside of us that can make others believe in us too.

Early in my career of being self-employed, before I became a professional speaker, I would help book artists gigs in restaurants, senior centers, assisted living facilities and libraries. One time an activities director wasn’t interested in the musician I was promoting, but said she wanted someone to speak about health.

I can do that, I said to myself. But first I asked her, “Do I need certification to speak on health?”

She said I didn’t.

“I can do that!” I said, eagerly.

Nevertheless, I did my homework and was able to speak about general, common sense type things like the importance of walking, eating whole foods, and not smoking.

I was nervous and read from the page, not connecting with the audience as I do today when I speak. But I was well received and invited back several times! Since then, I’ve spoken in front of countless audiences, from very small–as in four people–to over a hundred.

Nowadays, I hardly read my notes. I don’t stand behind a podium. I walk around, crack jokes, talk to the audience, and ad lib.

During the pandemic, my speaking career was on halt, but I’ve used ZOOM to my advantage, reaching people all over the world! Now that the pandemic has lightened up tremendously, I’m out and about again with six upcoming lectures!

And it all started with four great words — I can do that!

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Visit my business page, Pear Tree Enterprises, at: https://peartreeenterprises.wordpress.com/

There is No Such Thing as Gift of Gab

Published August 30, 2022 by Maryanne
Sunset at Keyport, NJ … Nice and quiet

There is no such thing as “gift of gab.”
I often feel overwhelmed and completely taken advantage of, by many people over the years, because I’m a good listener, with a shy nature.
I truly believe I subconsciously began my journey of writing and public speaking in order to have a voice in this world.
What many people fail to realize is that a conversation is a two-way street. This is why I shy away from most people. It’s a sad truth that people are wired to only talk or care about themselves.
Little by little, I began my journey of putting a stop to one-sided conversations. Last week, for the very first time, I walked away while someone was still talking to me. It wasn’t an argument, I was simply bored to death listening to someone ramble about details of getting a new kitchen. Why would that interest me? Or anyone, really, unless you were a home designer.
What people fail to realize is if you’re doing all the talking, you’re boring someone. If you got this far, please, I beg you, if you want to make a difference in the world, stop doing ALL the talking. Give someone else a chance to talk. There is no such thing as “gift of gab.” And if you must talk, THINK before speaking, “Will this interest the person I’m telling?” Please know your audience. Or at least try. Why do people not realize how much talking AT someone can drain their soul. I’m completely tired of listening. I really need to rest. 💔

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

So, this is 59!

Published August 20, 2022 by Maryanne
August 19, 2022 … age 59
Birthday celebration with my husband (and our friends, Rob & Jayne) August 18, 2022
From left, Dennis, me, Jayne, Rob, August 18, 2022
Led Zep umbrella, in case it rained! (August 16, 2022)

I love birthdays, especially mine (I won’t lie!) I love being fawned over and getting gifts. Sometimes we can get too hard on ourselves (I am especially hard on myself) and birthdays are a great reminder how loved we are.

I never would have imagined being in my 50s would be so much fun. I’m blessed to still be very healthy and high energy. Life is so precious I make it a point to have an amazing one, with amazing people in my life. My husband spoils me so much and makes me laugh so hard. Our friends are the same. Always a memorable time together.

For the last year of my 50s, I do have some goals. I’d like to get a second printing of my book “The Gypsy Smiled” which is now out of print. (There might be a few left on Amazon by indie sellers). I’d like to book more speaking engagements (I have four from now until the end of the year!) And I’d like to continue doing all the other creative stuff I’ve been doing: journalism, over 50 modeling, working at events. Plus the fun stuff like concerts, going to vegan restaurants, and clothes shopping!

I want everyone know that I am PROUD of my age and not afraid to grow older. I trust that I have a lot more time on this planet, but you never know, so I’ll keep having fun until the fun runs out!

Next year is the big 60!!

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Just Because I Want Respect, Doesn’t Mean I’m Not Tough

Published June 19, 2022 by Maryanne
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, tough enough!

Just the other day, in a business situation, I was told I had to be more “tough” because I didn’t want to deal with a woman who was disrespecting me by screaming at me like I was an animal. I thought she’d have a heart attack right on the spot. Being a health freak, I kept my cool. And then discussed it with a higher up. Yet, she was defended, while I was told to toughen up.

No, I don’t need to learn to be tough. This woman needs to learn how to control her temper.

There nothing is wrong with defending yourself. But people who have problems controlling their temper go to anger management classes. Or they should.

We’re living in a sad world of “don’t take it personally” where people can do whatever they please and get excused for it. It’s not right. People need to be kind to each other and treat each other with respect.

By me being offended by rudeness, it doesn’t mean that I’m not tough. In fact, I am tougher, and cooler, than most people and here is why…

  1. I once jumped off a 100 foot bridge into the Delaware and was almost arrested with two other guys. The cop gave one of the guys the ticket to cover for all three of us. It was a dangerous thing to do. This was in the late 1980s, before the movie “Jackass” was famous. I am the original Jackass.
  2. I once kicked a guy and he fell backwards on an escalator because he grabbed my ass. He yelled at me, “What did I do?!” I said, “You KNOW what you did.” He said, “But you didn’t have to kick me!” I said, “Yes I did.” When I got to the top of the escalator, a bunch of women cheered for me.
  3. One time I was having lunch, alone, in a pizza parlor. I was in my late 20s. A guy was harassing me. He wanted to talk to me, but I wanted to read while I ate. But the jerk wouldn’t take no for an answer. I finally kicked him in the leg. He yelled at me and left. The owner of the place said to me, “All women should be like you. I wish my daughters were like you.” Two days later I went to a bank nearby. One of the women said to me, “You are a hero. He used to come in this bank and bother all the women. We heard about what you did, and he doesn’t bother us anymore!”

These are just a few examples of how life doesn’t scare me and how I do defend myself. However, in a business situation, I think people should be more professional and kind to each other. If one is bullying another, my opinion is that they should be suspended from work for a few days — not have it chalked up to the victim needing to toughen up. That’s just dumb.

What happens if the victim toughens up? Then you have not one, but TWO fools flying off the handle. DUH!

If you can’t get the support you need in a business situation, the best way to deal with a work bully is to ignore them altogether. And let the Universe take care of them. They will get theirs.

I look back at people who have harassed me for no reason at all and really bad stuff happened to them. One guy ended up in jail just a month after making my life a living hell (the jail thing was nothing to do with me, this bully just picked on the wrong one and got his dues!) Another, a tree fell on his car and destroyed it. And someone else, a guy she was crazy about broke up with her. These bullies didn’t get hurt or die, but points were made. You put out bad energy towards someone who does not deserve it; it comes back tenfold. Simple as that.

Life is like the movies. The good girl always wins! (While holding her head high!)

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Having an Unlimited Summer!

Published June 12, 2022 by Maryanne
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, New Jersey

Many people dream of an endless summer. Of course, most likely, that won’t happen. Life goes on with new seasons and/or responsibilities. So, instead of longing for the nearly impossible, why not work with something that can happen? Why not go for an unlimited summer? Make this the summer that you don’t put limits on yourself. You can start with friendships. Become friends with someone who is nothing like you! Stretching your boundaries is the way you learn and grow.

Check out my video about an unlimited summer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Jfb_TLYrhs

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Julia Child, an inspiration

Published June 9, 2022 by Maryanne
Julia Child, photo from Google

A few days ago I watched a documentary on Julia Child. I’m saying to myself, Why am I watching this? I don’t eat meat and everything she cooked grossed me out.

Nevertheless, her story was an inspiration. She had a beautiful love story. She also had a story about a woman rising to the top in a man’s world, with her husband at her side, when only male chefs were allowed in restaurant kitchens. She was a late bloomer who didn’t get on television until she was in her 50s. And it took over 12 years to write her first cook book–back in the days before computers, she typed (and tested) all her recipes over and over again till they met her idea of perfection.

She was also a cancer survivor who kept going, and did so much charity work. Even though the food she cooked wasn’t healthy, she lived to be 91 years old! This is proof that it’s not about what you put into your mouth, but what you put into your soul. Julia Child was a way cool inspiration!

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Over 50 Modeling, Photo Unretouched

Published May 20, 2022 by Maryanne
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, 2021, age 57

One year ago today, from a photo shoot with David Esposito.

I was 57. Photo unretouched. David Esposito doesn’t touch up photos. He likes them to be real.

Always be proud of your age, and all you’ve done in your life.

When you filter your fine lines, you filter your character. ❤

I also don’t do Botox or any other face alterations. If you do it, fine, good for you. But I don’t like the idea of it. That’s just me. I think every woman can look amazing with face yoga and facial massage. But that’s just me. Do what you like as long as you are happy.

There are days when I look old and tired too. But I realize I just need more rest or to make a change in my life. Your real face is a barometer for how happy you are. You may not need a facelift, just a change. 🙂

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Stepping Into Something New

Published May 3, 2022 by Maryanne
May 2021

I came across this photo of myself on Facebook from a year ago. The caption was “Step into Monday like a champion.” I liked the concept of me taking a step in the photo, with the caption of stepping into something positive.

To caption the same photo today, it would say “Step into Something New.”

Doing something new isn’t always instant. It takes months, or even years, of thought. Seeds are planted. Ideas comes up. And then you do something about it.

May 2021, we were still in the pandemic. This was around the time I decided I wanted to switch careers. Mind you, writing will always be in my heart, and in some way or another I will always be a writer. Hell, I’m still getting royalty checks from my books. But after you see your books in Barnes & Noble stores, you’ve reached a pinnacle. Where do I go from here? I can keep doing the same thing, continue writing books and articles. Or I can try something different that is also dear to my heart. Why not? You’re never too old to learn.

Last spring, I dabbled in art as a hobby. And then became a certified feline behaviorist.

Yes, cats are my favorite animals. But I love all animals, especially the furry little critters like hamsters, chinchillas, mice, rats, and guinea pigs. I’m also fascinated with fish. And birds.

I see these gentle creatures and it calms me. I want to learn more about them. How to befriend them. How to make them not be frightened. I want to also learn from them. What is it like to be so small in a world so big?!

I’ve investigated what careers there are that involve working with animals. I found something and am now on my way to a certification as small animal specialist!

Will this new career work out as successfully as my writing career? Time will tell.

But I am ecstatic to begin something new, with pets showing me the way! I look forward to working with my new teachers!

Photo swiped from Google

If you liked this blog, buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

International Dance Day 2022

Published April 29, 2022 by Maryanne
Dancing at Cake, NYC, 1995

Happy International Dance Day!

Even if you’re not that great of a dancer (I’m not!) you can’t deny how good it feels to move your body to music. Don’t feel insecure if you don’t have rhythm or the moves like Jagger, just get out there and do it! It’s not only great exercise, but it’s good for your soul.

I got the moves like jaguar, I got the moves like jaguar,
I got the moooo-ves…..

If you liked this blog, buy me a coffee: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos