motivation

All posts tagged motivation

Just Because I Want Respect, Doesn’t Mean I’m Not Tough

Published June 19, 2022 by Maryanne
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, tough enough!

Just the other day, in a business situation, I was told I had to be more “tough” because I didn’t want to deal with a woman who was disrespecting me by screaming at me like I was an animal. I thought she’d have a heart attack right on the spot. Being a health freak, I kept my cool. And then discussed it with a higher up. Yet, she was defended, while I was told to toughen up.

No, I don’t need to learn to be tough. This woman needs to learn how to control her temper.

There nothing is wrong with defending yourself. But people who have problems controlling their temper go to anger management classes. Or they should.

We’re living in a sad world of “don’t take it personally” where people can do whatever they please and get excused for it. It’s not right. People need to be kind to each other and treat each other with respect.

By me being offended by rudeness, it doesn’t mean that I’m not tough. In fact, I am tougher, and cooler, than most people and here is why…

  1. I once jumped off a 100 foot bridge into the Delaware and was almost arrested with two other guys. The cop gave one of the guys the ticket to cover for all three of us. It was a dangerous thing to do. This was in the late 1980s, before the movie “Jackass” was famous. I am the original Jackass.
  2. I once kicked a guy and he fell backwards on an escalator because he grabbed my ass. He yelled at me, “What did I do?!” I said, “You KNOW what you did.” He said, “But you didn’t have to kick me!” I said, “Yes I did.” When I got to the top of the escalator, a bunch of women cheered for me.
  3. One time I was having lunch, alone, in a pizza parlor. I was in my late 20s. A guy was harassing me. He wanted to talk to me, but I wanted to read while I ate. But the jerk wouldn’t take no for an answer. I finally kicked him in the leg. He yelled at me and left. The owner of the place said to me, “All women should be like you. I wish my daughters were like you.” Two days later I went to a bank nearby. One of the women said to me, “You are a hero. He used to come in this bank and bother all the women. We heard about what you did, and he doesn’t bother us anymore!”

These are just a few examples of how life doesn’t scare me and how I do defend myself. However, in a business situation, I think people should be more professional and kind to each other. If one is bullying another, my opinion is that they should be suspended from work for a few days — not have it chalked up to the victim needing to toughen up. That’s just dumb.

What happens if the victim toughens up? Then you have not one, but TWO fools flying off the handle. DUH!

If you can’t get the support you need in a business situation, the best way to deal with a work bully is to ignore them altogether. And let the Universe take care of them. They will get theirs.

I look back at people who have harassed me for no reason at all and really bad stuff happened to them. One guy ended up in jail just a month after making my life a living hell (the jail thing was nothing to do with me, this bully just picked on the wrong one and got his dues!) Another, a tree fell on his car and destroyed it. And someone else, a guy she was crazy about broke up with her. These bullies didn’t get hurt or die, but points were made. You put out bad energy towards someone who does not deserve it; it comes back tenfold. Simple as that.

Life is like the movies. The good girl always wins! (While holding her head high!)

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Having an Unlimited Summer!

Published June 12, 2022 by Maryanne
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, New Jersey

Many people dream of an endless summer. Of course, most likely, that won’t happen. Life goes on with new seasons and/or responsibilities. So, instead of longing for the nearly impossible, why not work with something that can happen? Why not go for an unlimited summer? Make this the summer that you don’t put limits on yourself. You can start with friendships. Become friends with someone who is nothing like you! Stretching your boundaries is the way you learn and grow.

Check out my video about an unlimited summer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Jfb_TLYrhs

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Julia Child, an inspiration

Published June 9, 2022 by Maryanne
Julia Child, photo from Google

A few days ago I watched a documentary on Julia Child. I’m saying to myself, Why am I watching this? I don’t eat meat and everything she cooked grossed me out.

Nevertheless, her story was an inspiration. She had a beautiful love story. She also had a story about a woman rising to the top in a man’s world, with her husband at her side, when only male chefs were allowed in restaurant kitchens. She was a late bloomer who didn’t get on television until she was in her 50s. And it took over 12 years to write her first cook book–back in the days before computers, she typed (and tested) all her recipes over and over again till they met her idea of perfection.

She was also a cancer survivor who kept going, and did so much charity work. Even though the food she cooked wasn’t healthy, she lived to be 91 years old! This is proof that it’s not about what you put into your mouth, but what you put into your soul. Julia Child was a way cool inspiration!

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Over 50 Modeling, Photo Unretouched

Published May 20, 2022 by Maryanne
Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, 2021, age 57

One year ago today, from a photo shoot with David Esposito.

I was 57. Photo unretouched. David Esposito doesn’t touch up photos. He likes them to be real.

Always be proud of your age, and all you’ve done in your life.

When you filter your fine lines, you filter your character. ❤

I also don’t do Botox or any other face alterations. If you do it, fine, good for you. But I don’t like the idea of it. That’s just me. I think every woman can look amazing with face yoga and facial massage. But that’s just me. Do what you like as long as you are happy.

There are days when I look old and tired too. But I realize I just need more rest or to make a change in my life. Your real face is a barometer for how happy you are. You may not need a facelift, just a change. 🙂

If you liked this blog, feel free to buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Stepping Into Something New

Published May 3, 2022 by Maryanne
May 2021

I came across this photo of myself on Facebook from a year ago. The caption was “Step into Monday like a champion.” I liked the concept of me taking a step in the photo, with the caption of stepping into something positive.

To caption the same photo today, it would say “Step into Something New.”

Doing something new isn’t always instant. It takes months, or even years, of thought. Seeds are planted. Ideas comes up. And then you do something about it.

May 2021, we were still in the pandemic. This was around the time I decided I wanted to switch careers. Mind you, writing will always be in my heart, and in some way or another I will always be a writer. Hell, I’m still getting royalty checks from my books. But after you see your books in Barnes & Noble stores, you’ve reached a pinnacle. Where do I go from here? I can keep doing the same thing, continue writing books and articles. Or I can try something different that is also dear to my heart. Why not? You’re never too old to learn.

Last spring, I dabbled in art as a hobby. And then became a certified feline behaviorist.

Yes, cats are my favorite animals. But I love all animals, especially the furry little critters like hamsters, chinchillas, mice, rats, and guinea pigs. I’m also fascinated with fish. And birds.

I see these gentle creatures and it calms me. I want to learn more about them. How to befriend them. How to make them not be frightened. I want to also learn from them. What is it like to be so small in a world so big?!

I’ve investigated what careers there are that involve working with animals. I found something and am now on my way to a certification as small animal specialist!

Will this new career work out as successfully as my writing career? Time will tell.

But I am ecstatic to begin something new, with pets showing me the way! I look forward to working with my new teachers!

Photo swiped from Google

If you liked this blog, buy me a kombucha: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

International Dance Day 2022

Published April 29, 2022 by Maryanne
Dancing at Cake, NYC, 1995

Happy International Dance Day!

Even if you’re not that great of a dancer (I’m not!) you can’t deny how good it feels to move your body to music. Don’t feel insecure if you don’t have rhythm or the moves like Jagger, just get out there and do it! It’s not only great exercise, but it’s good for your soul.

I got the moves like jaguar, I got the moves like jaguar,
I got the moooo-ves…..

If you liked this blog, buy me a coffee: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

My Guest Appearance on Anti-Bullying 101 Podcast

Published April 27, 2022 by Maryanne

I was honored to be a returning guest on James Burns’ “Anti-Bullying 101” podcast.

Some of the topics included: How I used humor to get the bullies off my back; advice to parents who have children who are being bullied; and much more.

James Burns is so awesome with his anti-bullying mission. In addition to my podcast, I encourage you to check out others as well.

You can hear my guest spot via this link: https://anchor.fm/james-burns5/episodes/Meet-Maryanne-Christiano-Mistretta-e1ho8u0/a-a7ql7es

Or you can view it on my anti-bullying YouTube Channel, here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mh3cqhKbdWA

If you liked this blog, buy me a coffee: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Pre-Pandemic and All is Well

Published April 26, 2022 by Maryanne
April 2019, Asbury Park, New Jersey

This morning I came across this photo of my husband and myself. We were in Asbury Park having coffee prior to the movie premiere of “Echo Canyon.” After the movie we saw live performances by Jakob Dylan, Jade, Cat Power, and others at The Paramount. I even scored the set list.

Not a care in the world. Who knew what was to come less than a year later? Careers tanked. As a public speaker, one by one, I received calls of gigs being cancelled. But, even worse, many got sick. I was lucky to avoid getting Covid, but some friends did, and one even died from it, along with several friends who died from other ailments. All in all, it was a very bad two years. Though my husband and I are positive people and we were able to produce some good–like creating music videos together and embracing parks and outdoor dining. I also was able to salvage some of my public speaking gigs via Zoom.

I don’t watch the news much, but it looks like we’re nearing the end of a dark, two-year tunnel. In New Jersey, masks are only required at medical places like the chiropractor and dentist. And some hair salons still require masks.

My husband and I have been attending in-door concerts again for the last six months, and planning even more. We’ve also been going to movies, and even running into friends we haven’t seen for some time.

It seems like life is getting back to normal and it’s all been a bad dream. The truth is, we’ll never get back the friends who had passed, as well as some of the opportunities.

We just have to keep looking forward. Or even looking backward, at a more innocent time, like April 2019.

If you liked this blog, buy me a coffee: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

Beach Magic

Published April 23, 2022 by Maryanne
April 22, 2022, Move with Love

My husband caught me making a dumb face here, but trust me, I was ecstatic.

While life has ups and downs, there are always those moments when everything is just perfect, in addition to some new hope on the horizon. Friday morning I received great news, that I’d be helping out editing and writing for a magazine that I worked for as editor/writer several years ago. I had recently reconnected with the publisher. We had lunch together a few weeks ago and talked about the possibilities of me coming on board again. That and some other potential great news!

Oftentimes when good things happen, it snowballs. So the best thing to do when you receive great news is to celebrate to keep the energy on a high. My husband asked me what I wanted to do for date night, and it hit me–it was a gorgeous day/night for heading to the beach!

We stopped at one of my favorite health food stores and got some raw vegan meals. Then–the beach.

We watched the waves for a long time and had great conversation, as always. Talking about happy memories, and future dreams always makes for a sweet high. Living euphorically is how we are meant to live. Too many people play “victim” in life; and being human, I can fall into that sad trap as well.

The point is, when good things happen to good people (not only myself, but to those reading), you have to roll with it. Do not feel guilty for any success or goodness you have in life. You deserve it! Talk about it, and keep manifesting it!

My shirt says it all — “Move with Love” 🙂

If you liked this blog, buy me a coffee: https://ko-fi.com/maryannechristianomistretta

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos

I’m Vegan and Other Vegans Make Me Cringe

Published April 15, 2022 by Maryanne
Let Go of Your Ego

Though I’ve used cruelty free products since 1996, I haven’t officially become a vegan until last summer.

I think what took me so long was the fact that the certified bat shit crazy vegan troupe was stuck in my brain. I had to separate myself from them first in order to make that final leap.

No matter what I say in this post, some crazy vegan will see it and argue with me. But I dare just ONE vegan to come forward and say, “You’re right.” Because I am. Because non-vegans agree with me.

Vegans make loving animals seem like a cult. Trust me, I’ve been to the Peta House back in 1998, during one of the many times I’ve dabbled in veganism since 1986 when I first gave up meat.

They are downright NASTY to anyone who disagrees with them and use their vegan card as a badge of ego, being condescending to others and being overly proud of their vegan knowledge.

It’s discouraging to those who want to change to become vegan, because they don’t want to be like that. And meat eaters just laugh at us because of how insane we are.

Here are some of the over-the-top, ultra-ridiculous vegan “things” I — as a fellow vegan — disagree with:

  1. Vegans who won’t date non-vegans. This is so ego-driven it’s sickening. You are alienating yourself from others and acting superior. It’s also a missed opportunity. If you date someone who isn’t vegan, you are exposing him/her to vegan foods and helping animals by getting a meat eater to give up meat meals a few times a week. It’s like how plant-based eaters go for their Meatless Mondays. It is NOT a bad thing and shame on you vegans for judging others. Date whoever you want! Do not listen to kooky vegans!
  2. Vegans who don’t keep cats as pets because cats can’t be vegan. This is just wrong. Yes, farm animals deserve to live, but so do our pets. Cats can survive outside, but the odds are against them. If you live in a city, they can get hit by a car. If you live in the country, they could get attacked by coyotes. It’s a thin line here, but not everything is black and white. It’s gray. When I feed my cats, I say a prayer to the farm animals and hope that someday scientists can come up with a better solution. So shut the fuck up you vegan control-freak hypocrite! I have three cats and they will not be vegans because that is cruelty to animals! I took an old cat out of an animal shelter and adopted him. If you see something wrong with this, you are a cruel, weird individual.
  3. Vegans who alienate themselves from non-vegans. This is weird too. They won’t go to non-vegan restaurants. Or they go and look sad the whole time because they’re not getting the full vegan experience. It’s not about YOU! We are on this planet to get along with other people. Just live and let live. I would like to believe that everyone will become vegan in due time. But why shun others who are not? For whatever reason, they don’t make the connection about why eating animals isn’t cool, but who the fuck are we to judge them? I sound angry because I am angry about how condescending vegans can be. There are MANY non-vegans who do great things for animals, whether it’s donating to shelters, adopting not shopping, volunteering for animal rescues, and so on. Yet, you continue to preach and judge them! Fellow vegans, I am ASHAMED of you, and cringe that I am in YOUR elitist club!

We need a NEW name for the vegans who aren’t this way. Those who are compassionate towards others who aren’t vegans but love animals. Those who admire others who aren’t vegan but who are doing their best. THAT is who I am as a vegan. If you’re not a vegan and you’re a great pet mommy or daddy, I ADMIRE YOU! If you’re not a vegan, but you make an effort eating plant-based meals, I ADMIRE YOU! If you’re not a vegan, but you sign petitions for justice for animals that have been abused, I ADMIRE YOU!

Do not let these OTHER vegans put you down. This is not my troupe! I honestly am disgusted by them. And believe me, while many ARE like that, not all of us are.

I would LOVE to hear from fellow vegans who agree with what I have to say. And for those vegans who don’t agree, I DO NOT want to hear from you, because I’ve heard ENOUGH from you for the past several decades and you are DEAD WRONG! I’m so glad I am not like you!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is the author of the following books:

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: https://eroticbooknetwork.com/product/love-cats/

Maryanne is also available for book editing and coaching. Rates are competitive.

And for positive messages, visit Be YOUnique, the Anti-Bullying You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLq6J9MSvcjd-haQ30ycLWA/videos