rant

All posts tagged rant

Only Creeps Say “karen”

Published July 18, 2020 by Maryanne

CreepsPhoto by Robert Zunikoff, courtesy of Unsplash

If you Google what the slang term “karen” means, there’s just so much about it and so many ways to analyze it, and misuse what it originally meant. In a nutshell, nowadays, it’s any middle-aged white woman who complains to a manager because she feels entitled. We’ve gotten to that point where the term is so misused (like the words “narcissism” and “literally”) it’s derogatorily tossed at ANY woman who complains.  It’s a stupid word that translates to “Shut the fuck up — WOMAN!” It is downright nasty — and creepy! And merely another way loser men try to belittle women; taking us back to the 1800s. Way to go, assholes!

I get it, you think you’re such a big deal sticking up for a worker who doesn’t do his/her job right? Well, let me ask you, why should a person who works in service be cuddled like a little lamb? If you are hired to do a job of service your job is to do it with a smile on your face. Don’t take your shit out on customers!

This is where society has gone wrong — big time. Long gone is the saying, “The customer is always right.” We’re living in times where it’s frustrating to even call on a manager because no one has the balls to train their employees correctly. People of service can do whatever the hell they want — and get away with it. They will lie and so will the manager in order to not look bad. No one wants to man up and be responsible for screwing up.

That is bad news. You can’t even say it’s “bad business” because no one cares. From the largest corporation down to small businesses, everyone has to be right. All. The. Time.

And you have the self-righteous stander-bys  chiming in, “Calm down KAREN” which makes the situation no better. Doing that makes you a BULLY! Why don’t YOU calm down and mind your own business? No, man’s gotta be a “hero” — but the “hero” has it all wrong. Making someone feel small just because she spoke up for herself makes you a ZERO! And a CREEP!  In fact, anyone who jumps on the “karen” bandwagon is a CREEP and here’s why:

  • Mentally stable people don’t call names. If there’s a problem, they talk to each other like adults.
  • Mentally stable people don’t randomly attack others. They mind their own business.
  • Good service is a part of the job. A worker is representing a company. When you go to an establishment, you deserve good service. No one should be called names for calling a manager if service is not up to par. In fact, going to management will help the establishment develop and grow. You learn from mistakes, so put on your big boy pants and LEARN!
  • Using a sexist/ageist term in general means you are a loser. Sexism and ageism is a thing. Educate yourself.
  • Women should not be silenced. Simple as that.

So, you have a choice. Do you want to continue acting like a big baby and calling others names? Or do you want to up your game and learn that it’s not cool to judge people?

And, to the ladies, I say, continue to stick up for yourself if you’re being treated poorly. Don’t let men try to silence and shame you by name-calling. They are fools. You know who you are!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. In addition to Love Cats, she is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: Love Cats

Visit Maryanne’s You Tube Channel here: Be YOUnique

 

My Response to “Appalled Graphic Designer”

Published June 24, 2020 by Maryanne

Girls Life

Recently, an “appalled graphic designer” changed the cover of Girls’ Life to her liking. Apparently, the original cover wasn’t empowering to young women. You can read the article here: https://womenyoushouldknow.net/appalled-graphic-designer-shows-girls-life-magazine-what-their-cover-should-look-like/

My response is something not many women want to hear, but it’s a reality that isn’t talked about much.

I came from a broken home. My mother worked two jobs to support two girls. I went to a prep high school and did excellent freshman year, but because we lacked the funds, I had to transfer to a public school, which I hated.

Bottom line, I graduated by the skin of my teeth and went straight to work, without college. Nevertheless I got opportunities and became what I wanted to be — a writer!

The first magazine I worked at, I KNOW I was hired because of my looks (back then, I am now in my 50s and just mediocre). And I am fine with that because back then I had nothing else to go on. Prior to that I was a waitress, drinking on the way to work, because I lost my dear grandmother who helped raise me and I felt devastated. I felt hopeless day in and day out. Not every woman is born an Einstein; and not every woman has opportunities. Some of us work very hard at it and if being cute and stylish gives some of us an edge, why not? At the time it might be all we know.

Don’t hate beautiful women, you don’t know their story!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. In addition to Love Cats, she is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit:Be (Extra)Ordinary

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: I Don’t Want To Be Like You

Her fiction book “Love Cats” second printing is now available, under the pen name Krystianna Mercury, from Pink Flamingo. You can purchase it here: Love Cats

COVID-19 Health & Safety in Health Food Stores

Published April 6, 2020 by Maryanne

Health Food -- My coconut wrap, arugula, avo, tomato, coconut cheeseCoconut wrap with avocado. tomato, and arugula 

Yesterday I had a horrible experience in a health food store. The owner sent me an email apologizing, so I won’t “name and shame” but I think it’s important to share my experience in case others have something similar happen to them. And I made a promise to myself to never support them again after what went down.

First, this is MY POLICY…

Beginning today, I am no longer supporting mom and pop “health” food stores who do not respect the boundaries of COVID19. This includes: 1. Cashiers/managers and other workers NOT social distancing. 2. Stores that do not sanitize their carriages; 3. Store that have a “policy” for CUSTOMERS to wear those vinyl/latex gloves because they are unsanitary when used incorrectly; 4. Stores that do not clean their parking lots that are filled with said gloves discarded on the ground.

Now, my bad experience…

There’s a health food store I’ve favored for over a decade. They had everything. Great produce, mineral make-up, toiletries, and perfume that doesn’t test on animals (I’ve used cruelty free products since 1996), and even a great selection of incense.

Two weeks ago, I noticed they had vinyl gloves for customers to wear to shop. These types of gloves never sat well with me. In fact, I think they are disgusting. Nevertheless, I put a pair on and within seconds I was pulling them off because I could feel my sensitive skin reacting to them. I tossed them in the garbage. I shopped, then afterwards I went to my car and noticed these gloves were discarded all over the lot. The store didn’t take care to clean up and put them in the garbage. I found this to be vile and was proud of myself for not participating in the glove thing.

Yesterday I went back to the store and now it was mandatory that customers had to wear gloves. I told a cashier that I couldn’t wear them because last week they made my hands red.

Well, she took it upon herself to come out from behind her cash register and scold me — two feet away from me! Not at all social distancing. Now I was freaking out because I knew this person was a smoker and not in the best of health. Even though I’m very healthy, I didn’t want her to pass it to me, if she had it, then I might pass it to someone else who isn’t very healthy! So not cool.

At this point, I’d also like to say, that this store does not sanitize their carriages. This is something that never bothered me before. I am not a germ phobic, but now with COVID19, I can’t…

Anyway, I told her I was going to contact the owner of the store because she was harassing me. She went nuts and told the manager of the make-up department that I was going to tell on her. What a big baby! The make-up manager wasn’t much better in insisting that I wear the gloves. It made no difference to her when I said I was a professional writer/author and I couldn’t afford to have my hands get red, itchy, or whatever else would happen because two weeks ago I had a bad reaction to the vinyl gloves. Did she give a shit? No. Instead the two women continued to behave like scary, uptight school marms as they went on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about “store policy.”

I was like, “forget it,” and left. Without groceries.

Then I called one of their other stores to speak to the owner. He wasn’t there but another manager told me I could go back into the store wearing WINTER GLOVES.

REALLY?! WINTER GLOVES?! That is even more unsanitary! I practically laughed in her face.

I left feeling defeated. It was a 25-minute drive and now I had no groceries for the week. When I got home, I researched and found this wonderful article from Men’s Health: You Shouldn’t Be Wearing Gloves To Go Grocery Shopping

I smiled to myself and posted this on Facebook. A nurse friend said the article is correct. Being right was cool, but it didn’t take away from the drama of being yelled at by two misinformed puppets who seemed to take a sadist delight in ganging up on a friendly, happy, petite, attractive woman. It was an extreme level of catty I haven’t experienced in a long time; from two mean women who were stuck in a go-nowhere job. Perhaps they were pissed that they had to work during the COVID19 pandemic. But that is not my problem. They should take it up with their boss.

The incident took it’s toll on me and I had a headache since last night. This is when I realized, you can’t call a place a health food store when it’s stressing you out, because STRESS IS NOT HEALTHY!

Later that day, my husband took me to Whole Foods. Over the years I had my issues with that store too, but to my surprise, the way they were handing things was impressive. They had customers lined up outside, letting people in as others left. Everyone was politely standing six feet apart. The wait wasn’t bad at all, especially since it was a gorgeous spring day.

Inside some were disobeying the six feet rule, but my immune system is pretty stellar so I wasn’t worried. Especially their mouths were covered with masks and they weren’t scolding me, so no accidental spit was coming out of their mouths like how some people get when they yell.

When I paid, and I am not an Amazon Prime member so I don’t get a discount, my total was 20 percent less than what I usually pay at that mom and pop store. They also carry some brands I like that the other store doesn’t.

So until this pandemic ends and I can go food shopping every day like I used to and support other mom and pop health food stores, I think I’ll be just fine going to Whole Foods as a one-stop shopping place.

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

“The Gypsy Smiled” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Gypsy-Smiled-Maryanne-Christiano-Mistretta-ebook/dp/B074VC7MT9

 

 

How to Spot a Scam on Facebook

Published January 9, 2020 by Maryanne

scam+alert28

Before I get into it, first I want to say that both Facebook and Craig’s List are great tools for people who work for themselves. As an author, ghost writer, blogger, editor, and public speaker, I’ve been successfully self-employed since 2008, in part thanks to Facebook and Craig’s List.

From time to time, I’ll post an ad on a Facebook community page seeking work as a ghost writer or editor. I’ve met many clients this way and it gets my name/info out there for referrals.

The other day I was thinking about posting in a local community again and I saw something suspicious. It was an ad offering a large sum of money for a simple task of posting real estate ads on to Craig’s List. After some investigation, I realized it was a scam. A person in real estate “hires” someone to do their busy work posting ads on Craig’s List. But then they don’t pay their hired help for doing the work (which is promised after a two-week period). The person makes all kinds of excuses why they can’t/won’t pay. If you Google “Craig’s List Real Estate Scam” you will find many stories about this scam.

Now, what makes victims fall prey to these scams is that the scam artist will create a beautiful Facebook page. They will steal photos of an attractive, approachable looking woman (or man) and create a fake page, with a fake name. The person will be featured in various photos taken over the years, on glamorous vacations, with a cute pet, with friends or a lover. The punchline is — LOOK CLOSER — there will only be a few “likes” for each photo and hardly any engagement with so-called friends/family. This is the dead giveaway! Do not walk away, RUN!

As we know, the majority of successful people on Facebook have reached their friend limit and engage with their friends/fans/family on a regular basis. For real accounts you’ll see hundreds of comments.

Scam artists can never have enough time to create a seemingly true picture because they are too busy scamming. This particular page I saw was one of the more elaborate ones I’ve seen. Others are the more obvious type of fake with just simply a few photos (of a very good looking female or male) with limited engagement. But those are the types that seem to want fake love and fake relationships, not necessarily money (or your time to work for them at no pay).

With what I already knew, and some further investigation, I exposed a scam artist and he/she was banned from the job hunting community!

It breaks my heart reading real stories about people in vulnerable situations (the one I read yesterday was home bound in a wheel chair) getting scammed.

If you’re self-employed, or seeking work in between jobs, or just need some extra cash, here are ways to avoid being scammed:

  1. Ask for a phone number and an email address. Do not EVER work directly from Facebook Messenger and/or Craig’s List addresses.
  2. When you get a phone number, call it at least once for any reason. Make up a dumb question. You need to make that verbal connection to know the person is real.
  3. Over the years I’ve worked with clients all over the country and in other countries. But I’d suggest if you first start working for yourself, remotely, stay as local as possible. Unless you know for sure the person you’ll be working with is honest and sincere.
  4. If you’re asked to create a fake Gmail account — DON’T DO IT! The person can use this to find out your passwords and get information to your other important stuff like bank accounts.
  5. Do not provide a social security number over the internet. Only send a W-9 form to a legitimate email address that belongs to a legitimate company/organization.

If you have anti-scam tips or stories you’d like to share, feel free to comment below! 

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta can be reached at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com.

She is available for blogging, ghost writing, writing. She is also available for book signings and motivational speaking engagements. She is the author of the following books :

“Be (Extra)Ordinary: 10 Ways to Become Your Own Hero” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Extra-Ordinary-Ways-Become/dp/1733546227

“I Don’t Want to Be Like You” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback, Kindle or audio copy, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

“The Gypsy Smiled” is available on Amazon. To get your paperback or Kindle version, go here: https://www.amazon.com/Gypsy-Smiled-Maryanne-Christiano-Mistretta-ebook/dp/B074VC7MT9

 

Why I Left Young Living

Published January 22, 2019 by Maryanne

young-living

Perhaps “left” is a strong word. I didn’t exactly “leave” Young Living. I just decided to forfeit my status as a Young Living Star and save $100+ per month.

When I was first exposed to Young Living oils,  it wasn’t a bad thing. I loved the oils. And I still do. For four years I was excited to try various oils each month as well their soaps and body lotions, which are incredible.

Sales is not my forte, but I did manage to get a few people on my down line simply by speaking, organically about the oils and products in passing. I had a decent run of receiving small checks each month as well as free product for accumulating reward points.

There were times when I had a full bathroom cupboard stocked with about four YL toothpastes, five soaps, and three body lotions. In my kitchen cupboard were over 20 oils from their Vitality line that I’d never use in food because they are way too potent. Honestly, I’d rather use fresh herbs as spices than Young Living oils. And while some oils are great to use to help you get over certain ailments, hey, I’m a very healthy person. So, to be honest, I rarely use Young Living oils for my health! And, finally, there was all the stuff I’d never try–stuff I just wasn’t interested in. Currently, I have some favorite oils that I use as perfumes, but they are definitely going to last for at least the next 10 months.

When I gave up my Star status, and forfeited my Essential Rewards and the ability to get a check each month, which had now dwindled because the people on my down line who purchased the most had also left, I stayed on board because as I said, I do like their stuff. But four months later, there must be close to 100 bottles of oils in my house that I rarely use! When I thought about their fabulous body lotions, I signed in to get some for the winter. Then realized, there are body lotions by other companies that are just as clean and smell just as lovely, but cheaper.  I didn’t order anything. But who knows if I will in the future? As of now, I’m just not feeling it.

But, then, the biggest reason of all–Young Living is not my passion or my dream job.

When it comes to work, there are two things–and two things only–that I am passionate about. That’s writing and public speaking. I’ve been incredibly blessed that I’ve been able to make a living as a writer since 1995. Not that many people are as fortunate. For me to give up writing and public speaking, to invest in Young Living full time would be like Cher doing  infomercials; a total waste of talent!

Why on earth would I want to sell oils when I could be (and am!) writing books?! It just doesn’t make sense, right?

For years, in the business world, people have been saying, “Do what you love and you never work a day in your life.” Well, that’s me, especially since I ditched Young Living.

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta is a motivational speaker and the author of “I Don’t Want to Be Like You” which addresses her experiences with being bullied. You can order the book from Amazon here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

Her next book “BeExtraordinary” will be published in October 2019 by KiCam. To pre-order or visit the landing page, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

To book Maryanne for a speaking engagement, contact her at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

Excellent! Diner Responds to Complaint About Inaccurate ‘Vegetarian’ Menu Item!

Published June 14, 2013 by Maryanne

menu 2Wow, just two days ago I wrote to a local restaurant complaining that they listed items that contained cheese as “vegetarian.” You can read the blog I wrote here: https://maryannemistretta.wordpress.com/2013/06/11/cheese-is-not-a-vegetarian-item/

Well, the restaurant responded to my email:

Maryanne,

Thank you for your response and you are right that is not vegetarian. Our Executive staff has been informed. THAT WILL NOT BE ON OUR NEW MENU. 

We Appreciate your response and your patronage.
Have a Wonderful Weekend!!!
A Blessed & Happy Fathers Day
 
Best regards,
XXXXXXX
See how it always pays to speak your mind! I hope this inspires vegans and vegetarians to speak up more often!

Cheese is NOT a Vegetarian Item!

Published June 11, 2013 by Maryanne

cheesePhoto swiped from Google search

Hello,

I was just checking out your menu and noticed that some of the salad items had the word “vegetarian” next to them, yet contained cheese.

Please let me educate you — cheese is NOT a vegetarian item. Cheese is made from enzymes or rennet which comes from the lining of the stomach of a cow or sheep. Please omit the word “vegetarian” from the salads on your menu, as this is false advertising and an insult to the intelligence.