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Why I Left Young Living

Published January 22, 2019 by Maryanne

young-living

Perhaps “left” is a strong word. I didn’t exactly “leave” Young Living. I just decided to forfeit my status as a Young Living Star and save $100+ per month.

When I was first exposed to Young Living oils,  it wasn’t a bad thing. I loved the oils. And I still do. For four years I was excited to try various oils each month as well their soaps and body lotions, which are incredible.

Sales is not my forte, but I did manage to get a few people on my down line simply by speaking, organically about the oils and products in passing. I had a decent run of receiving small checks each month as well as free product for accumulating reward points.

There were times when I had a full bathroom cupboard stocked with about four YL toothpastes, five soaps, and three body lotions. In my kitchen cupboard were over 20 oils from their Vitality line that I’d never use in food because they are way too potent. Honestly, I’d rather use fresh herbs as spices than Young Living oils. And while some oils are great to use to help you get over certain ailments, hey, I’m a very healthy person. So, to be honest, I rarely use Young Living oils for my health! And, finally, there was all the stuff I’d never try–stuff I just wasn’t interested in. Currently, I have some favorite oils that I use as perfumes, but they are definitely going to last for at least the next 10 months.

When I gave up my Star status, and forfeited my Essential Rewards and the ability to get a check each month, which had now dwindled because the people on my down line who purchased the most had also left, I stayed on board because as I said, I do like their stuff. But four months later, there must be close to 100 bottles of oils in my house that I rarely use! When I thought about their fabulous body lotions, I signed in to get some for the winter. Then realized, there are body lotions by other companies that are just as clean and smell just as lovely, but cheaper.  I didn’t order anything. But who knows if I will in the future? As of now, I’m just not feeling it.

But, then, the biggest reason of all–Young Living is not my passion or my dream job.

When it comes to work, there are two things–and two things only–that I am passionate about. That’s writing and public speaking. I’ve been incredibly blessed that I’ve been able to make a living as a writer since 1995. Not that many people are as fortunate. For me to give up writing and public speaking, to invest in Young Living full time would be like Cher doing  infomercials; a total waste of talent!

Why on earth would I want to sell oils when I could be (and am!) writing books?! It just doesn’t make sense, right?

For years, in the business world, people have been saying, “Do what you love and you never work a day in your life.” Well, that’s me, especially since I ditched Young Living.

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta is a motivational speaker and the author of “I Don’t Want to Be Like You” which addresses her experiences with being bullied. You can order the book from Amazon here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

Her next book “BeExtraordinary” will be published in October 2019 by KiCam. To pre-order or visit the landing page, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

To book Maryanne for a speaking engagement, contact her at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

Giving Goals

Published January 19, 2019 by Maryanne

baby and mommyPhoto by Mistretta

People have been busy writing down their goals for 2019, which is great. Then it dawned on me, it would be awesome to have giving goals as well.

There are three ways to give: money, time, and sharing (in other words, being vulnerable). Below are ways to up the ante for all of them!

  1. Money. Even if you’re on a strict budget, money is the easiest way to give. You can put a dollar in a veteran’s can and get a free poppy. For some, it’s the best we can do, but I think in our hearts we always want to do more. In my younger days I know I did. When the basket went around in church and I was only able to spare a few dollars, I secretly longed for the day I could throw in a $20 bill or more. Then that day happened! My next goal was for the Go Fund Me pages. I wanted to give more than $50. And that happened too. As we earn more, we can focus more on giving to others. It’s great to share!
  2. Time. Time is a very precious thing to give someone because life is short. You hear so many stories about children who have had successful parents that were never around. This is a lesson to balance your time so you can be more giving to people you love. While being spontaneous is wonderful, it’s also important to balance your day so you can be able to balance your time. Since I work for myself, at home, I have the luxury of making my own hours. That said, there’s a time I plan to shut down and devote to my husband and cats. Of course I also like to donate my time to good causes, and fun stuff. But always remember, to take time for yourself because if you’re not healthy and happy, you won’t be able to make others happy. Then when you feel optimal, you can give time in so many ways–volunteering, listening, offering your help, surprising someone by doing something nice unexpectedly. The list goes on and on! With little money to spare, you can always be creative with your time. Or even if you have a lot of money, perhaps someone would appreciate your time more? It’s something to think about.
  3. Sharing/Being Vulnerable. Sharing and being vulnerable is the biggest and best way to give, in my humble opinion. Time and money are the easy way out because ego isn’t involved. But when you take the time to pour your heart out to someone who desperately needs to know he or she is not alone, that is GOLD! Many people are afraid to share because of their ego. They want to put on a facade that they are perfect. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times, the most inspiring people are the ones who are so free and open about sharing. They have truly made the world a better place. By “sharing” I don’t mean venting. I mean digging deep inside, no longer feeling the shame, and going with your heart and gut that by sharing something bad that happened to you, you are going to make another person feel not so alone! How great is that?! It takes a strong person to say, “Screw it, I’m going to try to help someone else. I don’t care if I am judged!” Anyone who has gone that route should be super proud of themselves. Put aside any shame you are feeling, because it’s not your fault that something bad happened to you if some loser took advantage of you. Because it’s a horrible person who should feel the shame–not YOU! So if you want to be a better friend, or a better person in general, make a point to get vulnerable. It’s the greatest way to give! You never know who you may help!

What do you think? What are your giving goals for 2019?

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta is a motivational speaker and the author of “I Don’t Want to Be Like You” which addresses her experiences with being bullied. You can order the book from Amazon here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Be-Like-You/dp/1726273261

Her next book “BeExtraordinary” will be published in October 2019 by KiCam. To pre-order or visit the landing page, go here: https://kicamprojects.com/shop/be-extraordinary/

To book Maryanne for a speaking engagement, contact her at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com

Dream Come True!

Published February 25, 2017 by Maryanne

sam_2169Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, author

Yesterday my life changed.

I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw the email that my third book that I’ve been shopping around for almost a year was going to be published — traditionally!

My first two book efforts were self-published, which was an incredible experience in itself. I am forever grateful for making the effort of putting out two of my own books. It was exciting hiring good friends to do the cover and to proofread. And then be in charge of my own marketing experience, getting myself on radio stations, in libraries, and record stores for book signing events. What a ride!

Then it got to a point where I wanted to see what would happen if I didn’t go for the instant gratification. What would happen if I shopped my third book around?

“The Gypsy Smiled” is in a unique category, music fiction. I did not invent that genre, as I’ve seen it used before. Last year I sent it out to several publishers and then waited.

And when I least expected it, I was contacted by a traditional publisher! My book will be published and available all over the world in the next three to six months!

So, not to be secretive, but I’d rather stop here and when the book is published, I’ll talk about it — especially how super cool my publisher is!

All I will say, at this point, to anyone — don’t give up on your dreams! Keep believing in yourself and enjoy every bit of the ride. I mean, the chances of being published traditional are pretty slim; and I am so humbled to be one of the fortunate ones.

You just have to love what you do, whether you are successful or not. Love every minute of the process: the writing and the writer’s block; the success and the rejection letters; the praise as well as the bad reviews … and the long days where it seems like nothing is happening, because it really IS; the universe is just getting all the ducks in order for you to start shining.

It happened to me, and it could happen to you!

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, now an upcoming traditionally published author, has self published two books, both available on Amazon:

On the Guest List: Adventures of a Music Journalist: https://www.amazon.com/Guest-List-Adventures-Music-Journalist/dp/162903908X4

Love Cats (in paperback and Kindle versions): https://www.amazon.com/Love-Cats-Maryanne-Christiano-Mistretta/dp/1681020513

She is also an award-winning journalist, currently writing for Vitamin Retailer magazine and New View Media news publications; as well as proofreading legal ordinances at Coded Systems in Spring Lake, New Jersey. 

The 1990s, the Last Romantic Era

Published January 5, 2017 by Maryanne

modeling-outlaw-biker

The 1990s; the last romantic era. We were beautiful but didn’t need Instagram or Facebook to prove it to anyone. We created poetry; a high form of art that people actually got back then. We interpreted lyrics our own way without the use of the internet. We hand-wrote each other letters. We laughed in person and on the telephone. We made our own clothes. We made each other tapes of songs we loved. And they would listen to them. We stood apart from the crowd. We had messy hair and that was a good thing. God bless the last romantic era. When we were really real.

Too Busy

Published January 4, 2017 by Maryanne

busy-2

Last night I was reading my old diaries from 1993. I was only 29-years-old and really loving my life. At that time I was living in a beautiful world people can’t even imagine today. Even as a very good-looking young woman, I had my dateless, lonely nights. The difference was, if you had the blues back then you could count on a phone call from at least five friends in one night! So being sad was not an option.

Today, other than my husband who I could always count on, I can’t imagine conversing with any of my friends without first making an appointment to speak with them. People are always so “busy.” Picking up the phone is no longer an option. So, I just cry instead.

The first of the year usually means new beginnings. As someone who is self-employed, this is usually the time when my business takes off. People always come to me for ghost writing, book editing, and public speaking engagements because they know they can count on me. There’s an old saying, “If you need something done, ask the busiest person you know because he/she will get it done for you.”

That said, I have to question everyone else’s version of “busy.” Because even when my version of “busy” gets so crazy, I’m glued to my desk for hours without getting up for a drink or to go to the bathroom, I ALWAYS sincerely answer an email from a friend who is in need.

This week started out as one of those busy weeks. Then one person cancelled an appointment — at the last minute. So not cool. And another just totally stood me up — no email, no phone call, no explanation.

I was heartbroken for being slighted. This is not the way I do business. This is not how I’d treat somebody. For all the technology we have in this day and age, this should not be. In this modern world, no one can be too busy to type three simple words in an email: “Can we reschedule?” And, I might add, at an appropriate time, not at the last minute unless someone very close to you died. Even so, I think back to when my father-in-law, who sometimes lived with us, passed away three months ago … I still was able to conduct business in a professional manner. And I still listened to problems from friends who needed a friend. Is it so much to ask the same in return?

It is not narcissistic to expect to be treated with respect. My time is just as important as anyone else’s. But here I am, crying my eyes out in the middle of the day, waiting patiently for my husband to get home so I can cry on his shoulder.

It is far from being “unprofessional” when you are disappointed by how so-called professionals treat you. There really needs to be a book on manners in this day and age. What happened to the Miss Manners column that ran in newspapers on a daily basis? Oh, I know, no one reads newspapers anymore.

No one does a lot of things anymore that they should. It’s a sad world we live in. A world without manners. A world without consideration. A world where people do whatever they please as long as it suits them.

And nothing can be done about it either. Just wait for the good karma you’ve been owed … so then things will turn around … and you’ll get everything you’ve ever deserved … because you already have a lot of it … Like a husband who truly adores and loves you. Because you were never “too busy” to find someone you adore and love.

So, hooray for demystifying the “too busy” myth! For those who are “too busy” will never seep the rewards that come from making time.

Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta is an award-winning writer and a public speaker. Contact her at: maryannechristiano@gmail.com 

 

 

 

Thoughts and Dreams (An Author’s Pre-Publish Excitement and Jitters)

Published May 18, 2015 by Maryanne

Darlene - Hallowed GroundPhoto of me, by Darlene Foster

I’ve always been of the mindset that we all have psychic powers within us and are able to guide ourselves through life by messages from the universe. I use these techniques in various ways. Because when we open our eyes, the signs are always there right in front of us. One time I was very sad about something and on a very windy day, a piece of light cardboard with a photo on it appeared in my backyard. The cardboard looked like a CD cover. I picked it up and it was a perfume called “Angel.” I took it as an omen that an angel was telling me things were going to be alright. And they were.

For the past few months I’ve been trying to self-publish my second book, “Love Cats.” I’m incredibly tense about it because it’s my first work of fiction and has four major sex scenes since it’s about singles in their 20s. As a former writer for “Screw” and “Gasm” I must say these are not your boring cliche simultaneous orgasm modern romance novel sex scenes. These are sex scenes as people really have sex … fumbling for condoms, or the WIO method, nervousness, trying to unhook bras, first time same-sex experiences … you get the picture. Nothing is left to the imagination. So you can see why I’m nervous about getting this stuff published.

“Love Cats” also deals with parental neglect, heartache, friendship break-ups and a main character who is unkind to animals. The more I re-read my book, the more frightened, yet anxious I am about having it published. Frightened because though it has it’s humorous situations, it’s incredibly intense.

The intensity reached my subconscious in sleep last night, when a beautiful brunette woman came to me, smiling, and wanting to be friends. I had no idea who she was. This image continued to haunt me throughout the morning as I tried to figure out who she was. Then when I was looking up famous musicians birthdays for the day, I saw that it was the birthday of Martika. I was unfamiliar with her work, except for the song “Toy Soldiers.” I Googled what she looked like, and that was the girl in my dream! So I searched for the answers in “Toy Soldiers” and immediately after reading the lyrics, I felt the pain of the characters in my fictitious “Love Cats.” Beck and Janey, loved so deeply and were going through a rough time, with much heartache and tears … something I haven’t known in ages since I am so happily ecstatic with my husband and soul mate.

I had to dig to the darkest corners of my soul to come up with these feelings expressed in “Love Cats.” How I felt, hurt in my 20s, and then exaggerated it ten-fold in order to creative good fiction because in my 20s I had such a “devil may care” attitude about everything bad that happened to me. I didn’t know real pain until I reached my 30s. After the death of my grandmother, it was like, so this is what heartache really feels like.

“Toy Soldiers” could have been a perfect accompaniment to my soundtrack for “Love Cats” even though it’s not in the new wave/dark wave genre of other work I’ve included such as Iggy Pop, The Cure, Joy Division, Kate Bush and so on …

As I was making friend with the woman in my dream, I’m making “friends” with what her song represents — that yeah, this book is harsh and I just have to take a deep breath and just put it out there. JUST LET GO!

Oh, and there is part two.

Also in the dream was a friend of a friend I lost touch with. Why was this person in the dream? We barely ever spoke to each other. But the cool thing was, we respected each others work. I always loved the bands this guy played in. And he came to one of my live poetry presentations and said he liked it. When I used to be on Face Book, this same person gave me the “thumbs up” when my first book, “On the Guest List: Adventures of a Music Journalist” was published. So I looked him up. He was easy to find because does a lot. He’s also less than six degrees separated from Iggy Pop … which is another connection to “Love Cats” because as I noted before, I wrote to Hal Leonard to gain permission to use Iggy’s lyrics in “Mass Production.”

So what this is all telling me is that all roads are leading to “Love Cats.”

“Love Cats” “Love Cats” “Love Cats” — that is all that’s been on my mind all day and night as I wait to get my paperback copy to approve in the mail. Hopefully this week. And hopefully, if goes as planned, pre-sales will be on Barnes & Noble Store and Amazon THIS WEDNESDAY!

I’m obsessively imagining who I’d love to play my characters in a movie. In spite of my descriptive words and what the book cover illustrates, I dream of a young Laura Leighton as my leading lady, Janey Peyton. Just both her in some goth clothes and she’s good to go.

laura leightonLaura Leighton

And the late Razzle from Hanoi Rocks is definitely the look I want for my Beck Stewart character. Let’s undead him for my movie! Beck is the hard-working, humble romantic who is madly in love with Janey.

Razzle-hanoi-rocks-34007384-400-574

Razzle (Hanoi Rocks)

I’d also want to go back in time, to get a very young Nicolas Cage to play Adam Durian, the eccentric, egotistical famous rock photographer. This character was so grand, he just had to be named after a fruit such as the Durian — a fruit that makes an entrance.

nicolas cageNicolas Cage

Then there is Morticia (or “Tish Girl” as Beck calls her) the green-eyed black Maine Coon, who is Beck’s pride and joy. Problem is, Janey hates cats. Can this beautiful little bugger change her mind?

black-smoke-maine-coon-cat

Maine Coon cat

And what happens when a little orange fur ball shows up on Janey’s doorstep during her darkest hour? Does she turn a blind eye to a kitten in need? Or does she remain a cat hater?

Pumpkin

Little Pumpkin

Is anyone enticed for the soon to be released “Love Cats”?

back cover proof CORRECTLove Cats back and front cover

 COMING SOON ON AMAZON AND BARNES & NOBLE STORE!

(KINDLE TOO!)

Career

Published October 29, 2014 by Maryanne

Cover proof 4My book, “On the Guest List: Adventures of a Music Journalist”

What a pleasant surprise this morning to see my book, “On the Guest List: Adventures of a Music Journalist” pinned on a “Career” board on Pinterest, amongst other music journalist greats like Lisa Robinson and Lester Bangs, which is such an honor because these are the journalists I’ve read when I was 12-years-old! I am humbled as I’ll never have the writing chops they do. “Guest List” is more of a love letter to myself, a recollection of things that meant a lot to me, not necessarily others, but if someone gets it, more power to them! Nevertheless, I’m still stoked to get royalty checks and unexpected surprises like this. I never expected my book to be doing as good as it is!

Check it out: ww.pinterest.com/emilybenda/career/?utm_campaign=activity&e_t=a0bfed66774b49e5b2e80aeb1a342f06&utm_medium=2003&utm_source=31&e_t_s=board_teaser

To order “Guest List” please visit my publishing company Next Century: http://www.nextcenturystore.com/on-the-guest-list-adventures-of-a-music-journalist.html