The Blogosphere Tit for Tat

Published September 27, 2012 by Maryanne

Years ago I was a huge fan of Live Journal. I met friends there who became friends in real life. It was super. But one thing I noticed, that I didn’t care for was that I only heard from certain people when I commented on their Live Journal pages.

After eight months of blogging on Word Press, I’m noticing a similar trend, and I have to say, I ain’t digging it.

As writers/bloggers, let’s be a little bit more honest with each other. I know we’re all busy, so read what you really enjoy, press “like” if you really liked what I wrote — not because I recently liked something of yours.

Honest, it won’t hurt my feelings.

When I first joined WordPress and started blogging, while I was willing to make friends and be supportive of other bloggers. I also decided that I wanted to keep it real as well. I wasn’t going to eat all my time up reading every single blog I subscribed to — even though I subscribe to a ton of them that I find interesting. And if someone didn’t like my blog, but I liked theirs, who cares … I’d still read theirs if I found it interesting. I have zero ego!

All the blogs I subscribe to come to my email box. I either read or delete according to my amount of free time, or whether the first few sentences are enticing to me — but most of the time I don’t even get that far because I’m so busy and I can always catch up later — or not. The bottom line is, it’s no biggie and shouldn’t be.

Admittedly, I do have a few favorites that I read every single one — but, please, I do not want any of you to feel like you have to read my blog in return.

I’d rather have less “likes” but have them be genuine. And nothing says genuine more than a comment (which is why I absolutely adore the people who read that don’t have blogs themselves and are following via email — now that is truly someone who feels I’m a good read!)

And for those of you I’ve become friends with, I like you no matter what. Maybe something you are writing about doesn’t particularly resonate with me, or I don’t have time to read it, so I may pass over it this time around. But if we’re friends for a long time and you’re creating for a long time, when I do press “like” again — it will be that more meaningful, no?

That said, happy blogging, happy reading, and happy “liking” (if you mean it!)

Advertisements

18 comments on “The Blogosphere Tit for Tat

  • I liked your post on this very interesting subject matter. I thought the same thing about “likes” at first. When I realized that some just press “like” for like’s sake, I kinda felt as you do. After thinking about it some more, I realized that, in my case I was putting too much emphasis on getting “likes” in the first place. We do care what other people think BUT, for me, I have now chosen to believe that, even when someone “likes” my post who has not actually read it or who may have only read a few lines because it showed up in their WP reader, they are still showing support for me/my blog in some way. I also have found some very cool blogs that I follow (that don’t follow me) because they liked a post of mine…whether or not they ever read it. πŸ™‚ Your main point, I believe and agree with, is that no one should have to feel they “have to” like and/or read our posts. Receiving a thoughtful comment from a reader is, as you noted, a really nice compliment on our content. A very thought-provoking post!

  • I have no problem with people “liking” posts, as opposed to commenting (I don’t always have the time to say something worthwhile about some of the wonderful posts I read!), but it does annoy me on some level when it’s obvious that the person never even clicked “read more.”

  • So totally true! I have to keep in mind that I blog for MYSELF. I appreciate the “likes” but lately I have started to notice this trend as well. I skim over my reader about once a week to catchup with fellow bloggers. I don’t always have time to leave a comment, so I am less inclined to give a like because I usually want to leave a comment when I hit the like button. When I read something that strikes me, but don’t have the time to leave a comment I always intend to get back to it, but you know how that goes….

    I do find it interesting that there is a direct correlation between the likes I receive and the likes i give. I’ve also noticed in a few cases that as a blogger’s blog becomes more “successful’ the blogger generally doesn’t have time for me anymore – perhaps it’s just my imagination, but maybe not. I continue to like what I like and write what I want and that’s all I can do. After all, i am not looking to become a world class blogger, it’s simply another hobby is all.

    It is a nice feeling though to have people follow your blog who don’t blog themselves. It does feel more genuine. but then again, people are busy and just don’t have the time to read and comment on everything – I know I sure don’t. I used to be so worried about being nice and touching base with every single person that “liked” one of my posts, i still try to do it out of courtesy, but unfortunately just don’t always have the time and I think most bloggers understand that and feel the same way you and I do about it.

    • 100 percent right on! All these great blogs, it’s a damn lot of reading to do, but I do read (as well as write) very fast and I can read maybe five per day depending if I’m working at home or on the road. But I do pick out the ones I truly relate to. Sometimes I “like” rather than comment because I’m the last to read and won’t add anything that someone else hasn’t said before. Plus, I don’t like to ramble either, so a simple “like” is like a smile or a nod in agreement πŸ™‚

  • Great post. I often feel guilty if I can’t read every post that comes my way. Likes are great but I too love it when someone responds and leaves a comment.

    Happy Blogging!!!!!

    ivonne

    • I felt more guilty with Face Book because people were actual friends and I didn’t want to miss their successes or sorrow. WordPress makes me feel less guilty because I don’t know them personally and a lot of bloggers already have their reader fan base, so if I don’t have time to read (or if the particular topic isn’t something I understand or relate to), they have other readers.

      But I do agree, responses are the best. I love learning about people, it’s the reporter in me πŸ™‚

  • I really like this post, so instead of whacking the “like” button, I’ll say it loud and clear: I can totally relate to how you reason things here.

    Except maybe I wouldn’t be so specific in regard to caring about those who will never bother to care about you: it’s not only about blogging, online “friends” and “followers”, but admiration in general.

    Genuine admiration lives on even after it becomes clear that it’s doomed to remain unanswered.

    For instance, I have every single Haruki Murakami novel on my bookshelf, so now what – call him and say “hello, would you please check out my blog cause I’m your reader?”

    I think, if one’s writing really kicks some serious ass, then the pleasure of reading it is already more than enough, so I’m quite careful when approaching authors (or artists or musicians, by analogy): unlike in products of their creativity, they can be pretty mean, rude and self-centered assholes in person.

    • Ahh, great insights! Thank you! As far as approaching authors/artists/musicians — everyone I’ve ever met was very nice and a few not so self-centered and actually asked me questions about my life, which is rare, but very cool when it happens πŸ™‚

  • Blogging is similar to talking to yourself. Whether reading blogs or liking blogs, it’s like eavesdropping on your private conversation. Now and then we’ll get a comment from others, like a plesant interruption, who want to give their two cents on the beautiful mess you’ve tapped out on your keyboard. I suppose it’s a type of therapy with my keyboard as the therapist and Starbuck’s as the couch I lie upon.

  • What do you think?

    Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

    WordPress.com Logo

    You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

    Twitter picture

    You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

    Facebook photo

    You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

    Google+ photo

    You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

    Connecting to %s

    %d bloggers like this: