Kurt Cobain loving his cat
Not once, but TWICE on television news this week, I heard about the study. And it’s a study that, for the life of me, I don’t get. But, yeah, I heard right, “Single women are less likely to date men with cats.” Don’t believe it? I wouldn’t have either, but I heard it with my own ears, and read it with my own eyes on many news sites. Here is just one: Women Are Less Likely to Date Men with Cats
In this study, men who had dating profiles with cats in the photo were viewed as less masculine and more neurotic.
I disagree. Men who love cats, or animals in general, are strong, good providers, fun to be around, intelligent, and sensitive. And I’m not only speaking about my husband, but the husbands/long term partners of my dearest friends. (And a few single men I’m friends with who love cats!)
When I was single, my cats were a great measure in choosing who was good for me. The great guys were the ones who bonded with my cats. Even if someone was not quite a match for me, I’ll still remember him as a good catch (for someone else) because of how he interacted with my cats. The losers…urgh, I’d like to forget them but who can forget when your cat pisses on the jacket of an asshole. Pretty funny! A very good cat who never misbehaved did that. He was letting me know in a subtle way, “beware” and he was right.
It wasn’t too long ago we were reading cool articles like this, Cats & Women: Why the Connection
So why, now, the disconnect? What made women turn on cats, or more specifically, men with cats? I can understand if a woman had a bad experience with a cat. In fact, I imagined such a thing in my fictitious erotic novel, Love Cats — where a young woman hates cats because of a bad experience, which we don’t find out until later. She ends up dating a few cat guys and eventually gives cats a chance.
Any random girl can dislike cats for whatever reason. But an entire study of females being “anti-cat” is something I just can not understand.
Back in my day, girls met potential dates in bars/clubs. I caught the tail end of online dating, so I don’t have much experience there. Like other women, I did have my laundry list. But it never occurred to me to put an animal on the deal breaker list. My deal breakers included: no smoking, no one obsessed with sports, no mama’s boys, no one who is verbally/physically abusive.
But “no cats”? Why would that be in a dating profile?
Perhaps a woman would be jealous of a man’s relationship with a cat? (I actually addressed that issue in Love Cats!) It’s not that far-fetched. Women can be catty (pun intended!). This can actually be a red flag for a guy! If a woman is jealous of your pet, would she also be jealous of your future son or daughter? Hmmm…..
But, let’s get back to why guys who love cats are AWESOME. You see, the bottom line is, cats are not instant-lovers like dogs. You need to nourish them and spend time with them in order to get them to come out of their shell. And if a man can take an independent cat and turn him/her into a playful, needy, snuggly bunny who runs to the door like a dog when he comes home, that man is a keeper! I should know, I married a man bonds with cats like that! And though we don’t have kids, I can only imagine what a good father my husband would be. In many families, pets are the stepping stones to children! (But let’s not count the idiots who give up their pets when they have kids!) Good pet parents equal good parents, period! It simply makes sense.
Perhaps single ladies need to re-think their views on men with cats. They may be missing out on a great one — and staying single a lot longer than they want to.
Maryanne Christiano Mistretta is the loving cat mom to Nicholas Gray and Sammy “Whammy” Keane Clemens. Her book Love Cats is written under the pen name Krystianna Mercury and available from Flamingo Media.